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I stare lost at my appearance in the mirror, my face pale and drained, lips chapped..dark circles around my eyes.
The suspense of today eating me alive as I tried to compose myself...something I've been trying to do since I got the news.
After Diamond and Chris divorce, she started stalking us. Sending death threats towards the baby and me, telling Chris he needed to agree to be with her if he wanted to see us alive.
Chris told me not to worry about it at first and I was hesitant but did as told. Until one day on my to the grocery store someone attempted to kidnap me, I screamed and fought until finally, bystanders saw the commotion coming to my aid.
The two men ran off and it was if I knew she meant what she said now. They held a knife to my 9-month-old stomach..one pressed against my neck.
That type of stress wasn't good for the baby and she knew that. Reaching Chris at home all I could do was cry while frantically trying to tell him the story.
he was so angry, I'd never seen him so..ballistic.
he went to the police station and filed a report for her arrest. They picked her up the morning after.
Two days later I was still shaken up about the situation, Chris kept a close eye on me at all times.
I had gotten up to use the bathroom and fell on my way there, my body had become so..weak.
I felt something slowly trickle down my leg as my heart began to speed up.
I looked down slowly..watching as my worst nightmare unfolded in front of me.
Blood..leaking at a fast pace as I began to sob uncontrollably, Chris running to me as he choked up on words. Running to get a towel, wrapping me in it and rushing me to the hospital.
we waited for an hour..to head some type of news or update.
was our baby okay? would I still be a mom? did she not make it?
Chris sat by me occasionally wiping my tears as I shook intensely. The doctor walked in both of our heads shooting up, our eyes yearning for some type of sign that our baby was okay.
His face held a look of remorse, he sighed placing his hand on my trembling one as I felt my whole body go numb.
I had never screamed so loud in my life...
So proud, so blessed, so happy to bring a new life into the world..just to have it taken from me.
I couldn't breathe..my heart pounded endlessly against my chest as Chris just rocked me... whispering "I'm sorry" in my ear repeatedly.
That was the day my life took a turn for the worse, depression hit like a ton of bricks.
The bond I had with my baby girl..gone, I wouldn't get to cry seeing her little face. Her dad wouldn't get to bug about her having her first boyfriend...
