God's love

Miss

I've missed this.

I missed writing and pouring out my heart to You, Father. Lately, I have been consumed by so many things and with that, I am so grateful knowing they all came from You. I've been keeping myself busy with my volunteer work and focusing my energy on my family and friends. Though I cannot say this for myself surely yet but I guess my lovelife will have to wait. Sure, I want it right now but I guess I'm not ready for the kind of relationship I want. Perhaps I need to grow better and chase after my dreams first. Knowing a person then loving them hurts especially when I'm left hanging in the middle of what we started. I've been through worse, yes, but it still doesn't make the hurting a little less. Nonetheless, it taught me well. There are many times still when I wish he'd chase after me again and I'm still hoping but I don't know how I'm gonna react if ever it would happen. Father, I'm only 20 but why do I feel like I'm missing out so much and achieving so little? God, if I didn't have You, I would've already taken my own life. Yes, I'm that weak and sensitive over the little things. I've been fighting silent battles only You know Lord and thank You because You have never left me. Your purpose for my life has given me hope that living isn't that bad. As a personal prone to depression, You have elevated me from the pits and transformed me for the better. God, thank You for saving me.