𝙷𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝙽𝚘 𝙵𝚎𝚊𝚛 || 𝚂𝙱𝙸

Chapter 19 - Philza.

Remember to read the triggers before reading this. I am using this as a ◇vent◇

Also, some were concerned because I've said how this was my way of coping,, I'm alright now! Don't worry! The trauma and such that happens in this book was all in the past, and I'm doing better now! Don't worry about me!

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He slammed the door behind him, sobbing uncontrollably as he leaned against the back of it. The child hugged himself tightly as his broken sobs filled his room. It happened again.

The beach blonde locked his door handle, and looked around frantically for anything to calm himself. All that got his attention was his full body mirror.

He only sobbed harder.

His crooked shirt, the slight folds in his shorts, the bruising around his wrists and neck, the hickeys....

He's seeing everything he hated about himself. Everything he did..

Phil hated all of it.

The kid ran forward, cocked his fist back, and punched as hard as he could. The glass shattered, some pieces falling to the floor. His hand got cut up quite a bit.

The beach blonde fell to his knees, choking on his own breaths and sobs. His knees were peirced with glass, and it all stung so bad. His tears burned and he just screamed.

His throat burned, and his cries were so fucking loud. The glass was still reflective, and he still saw everything on his body. He just shut his eyes and screamed louder.

He forced himself back, and kept going until he was in the middle of the room. The kid gripped at his hair and tugged at it. His head was pounding, and his throat was still burning.

Then there was a knock at the door. Phil had only sobbed more.

"Phil? Listen buddy, I'm sorry I couldn't- buddy, can we just talk face-to-face?"

Philza shook badly, and just mumbled 'no' over and over. He cried as he heard the doorknob jiggle, trying to open the door. It got slightly aggressive, and there was another knock- a bit louder than the previous one.

"Buddy! C-c'mon, I'm your father! You know I'd never hurt you!"

Bullshit.

That was all bullshit, and Phil knew it.

"Y-you al-alread-dy ha-ave-" The kid spoke through his sobs to the wretched man. He couldn't let him in. But he knew what would happen if he didn't.

"Buddy- Phil- c'mon kid-! Let me in, we can talk this out-!"

Phil forced himself up.

"I-I don-n't, I do-on't wa-anna I-...I-I-"

"C'mon kid! I'm your father!"

Phil walked over to the door. He didn't want to, he really didn't. He just didn't want to get the consequences when he gets angry. He gripped the doorknob shaking tremendously, and he unlocked it. He knew his dad heard the 'click' of when it unlocked, so Phil stepped backwards. He tripped over his foot and fell to the ground.

He held his knees and the blood streamed down. He looked at his cuts on his hand and knees, but saw the bruise around his wrists. He sobbed loudly and shut his eyes again as the door opened.

"Hey kid.."

Phil got picked up and they sat on the bed. The blonde shook more as his father combed his hand through the kid's hair.