𝙷𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝙽𝚘 𝙵𝚎𝚊𝚛 || 𝚂𝙱𝙸

Chapter 36 - Begging

Another short chapter,, but uh

Im in a bad state of mind, so I need to distract myself. And apparently my way of doing that is writing about my past-?

Oh well. Cry.

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2 days.

2 days went by.

Tubbo was coming back early tomorrow, and Tommy could not have been more antsy.

Technoblade was gonna talk to Caleb soon, as his dad arranged a meeting in a couple days for them to talk.

Philza was going to meet up and make plans with Kristen next week.

The family was doing really good honestly!

Until Wilbur.

Instead of making plans or talking with friends, he had been crying and getting hurt. He had spent the night at Romans. He wasnt even supposed to be there, anyway. The only reason he asked Phil to spend the night was because of what Roman did- what Roman showed him.

"LOOK AT THIS. THIS IS WHAT YOU MAKE ME DO, WILBUR!" Roman yelled, really loud. Wilbur got flashbacks from his dad, honestly, by the tone of his boyfriends voice. But Roman yelled, tears streaming down his face, and sleeves pulled up. There were lines of crimson red, lacing his arms and wrapped like ribbons.

Wilbur stuttered, trying to find the right words. He himself struggled with self harm, he didnt know how to help himself- how was he supposed to help someone else!?

"Ro- I- I'm sorry- how did-"

"YOU ALWAYS MAKE ME FEEL LIKE ITS MY FAULT! LIKE IM TO BLAME! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT DOES TO ME?!" Roman cried, and violently pulled his sleeves back down.

"Roman-"

"GOD DAMN IT- I JUST WANT TO FEEL LOVED! IS THAT REALLY TOO MUCH FOR YOU?!"

Roman grabbed onto Wilbur's shoulders, and forced himself and the other into a hug. He sobbed into the musician's chest and crook of the neck, muttering curses and self-deprecating insults in between cries. Wilbur hugged the other tightly, frozen from shock and self doubt.

He doesnt know what to do.

Yet again, when does he ever?

Why does he fuck everything up so badly? Cause before was so much different. And it's not Roman's fault either. Multiple people have told him the same thing.

So maybe it was him.

His dad, his past foster homes, the people in the orphange, and now his boyfriend.

Is he really that fucking horrible?

Must be.

Roman gripped a small bit on Wilbur's shoulders, snapping the taller one back to reality. Wilbur had felt a hot tear slide down his cheek as he stood silent, still hugging his boyfriend tightly. So god damn tightly. To be fair, Roman was always honest with him. Told him how much he fucked up. Told him when people were bad for him. Overall, was just honest.

"Do you even love me?"

"Of course I do!"

Roman stayed silent after that. If only Wilbur could see the snake like smile on his fucking face.

"Hey Roman.....?"

"Yes, Wil?"

Wilbur shuddered at Romans change of tone. He had wanted to ask since all of this started, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He was terrified of the answer.

"Do you.. actually... love me..?"

Roman tensed. He parted from the forced hug and shot a glare at the other.

"How could you ask that."

"Ro I just-"

"Are you seriously questioning me?"

"No I-"

"Wilbur what in the world gave you that idea?!"

Silence. Thick air suffocated the tall brunette, as words piled in his throat. Yet nothing left his mouth. He bit the inside of his cheek, while his.... 'boyfriend' just stared. But then he looked like an idea came into his head. And based off of the expression, it was a bad one.

"Are people telling you that I dont? Is it your fucking family?!"

That stunned Wilbur a bit, causing hesitation. Unfortunately, Roman heard the hesitate before the words.

"What?! No!"

"Why'd you hesitate?!"

"It shocked me! They don't- they love you-!"

"That's rich!"

"Ro-"

Roman cracked his knuckles. Loudly. Then, he scoffed. Wilbur backed up, terrified out of his mind. He was against the wall now.

"Maybe I should beat some sense into them like what I do to you."

He turned and started for the door, but Wilbur shot forward, and grabbed onto Roman's sleeve. Roman whipped around and slapped Wilbur, causing a small whimper to spill out the other's throat.

"Please! Don't! You can't hurt them, please!"

"Wilbur they've turned you against me!"

"No they didn't! I swear on it!"

Wilbur pulled against Roman's sleeve, shaking and about to cry from fear. He knows what Roman is capable of, he could not let anyrhinf happen to his family. They're everything to him. Wilbur fell to his knees, one hand on Roman's sleeve, the other hand grabbed the bottom hem of the shirt.

"Then convince me or something! Im not letting them take you away."

"Please! Roman! You can do it to me-!!"

Roman stopped walking, semi intrigued. Wilbur continued begging and tugging on Roman's shirt.

"Do with me what you want but please don't hurt my family!" Wilbur begged a bit louder, as a few tears fell down his cheeks. The chocolate brown curly locks were messy, and his cheeks and nose were red.

"Oh?"

"Take my pride and life, just dont hurt them!! Please! Roman please, just hurt me! Hurt me instead!!"

Roman had a sick fucking smile on.

He carefully grabbed Wilbur's chin, and made the other make eye contact. There was a moment of silence, before Roman cocked his fist back and socked Wilbur in the eye. Wilbur was knocked back, and was holding himself up by leaning on his elbows. Roman crawled on top of Wilbur, pinning him down so he couldn't fight back.

Not like he did, anyway.

"If you insist."

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956 words