You Play the Field - I Play the Strings

Chapter 8

I take a deep breath admiring myself in the mirror. I think I look good? Okay, I can't let anybody bring me down when I think I look good. It's too hot out. I had finally broke down and put on a pair of shorts. They cling tightly to my thighs... some people like thighs, I do. So there's no reason I should be hating on myself. I still have a loose T-shirt and a crewneck sweatshirt pulled on right over that.

I like the shorts. Fuck Cash and whatever his buddies names are. I can't let them bother me. I don't have to be so pathetic. Still I find myself internally cussing up a storm.

This is my first time wearing these here. I once again stare at the way my thighs bulge out, but I don't mind too much with my calves which seem a lot stronger. To me at least.

I leave my shirt untucked so it hangs over my stomach. With that I lift my chin to rub over the the moles that dotted my neck. Stupid bitches.

Opening the door I sigh at the sight in front of me. Will no not Will- fuck my guitar in his arms as he pretends to 'shred it'.

It's acoustic. Acoustic. Not electric. Not bass. Acoustic. He turns around with a smirk, but it drops when he sees me. His eyes fall over my body and I step back suddenly more insecure.

"You're not wearing pants" he swallows.

"I only have once class so I thought why not- it is too hot and muggy here" I explain.

"Well you look good"

"Shut up- I don't want your lies" I huff taking Will and putting him back in his case before bending over to grab my school supplies for the class he stops me by his next comment.

"You think I'm lying?" I stand and turn to find him closer than he was before.

"Conner I've been told how gross I am my whole entire life back home. I know you're lying" he states at me confused. I don't let him say anything knowing it's going to hurt me because of this pathetic crush I have on him.

"You good?" I ask noticing the way he he seems to be looking back and forth between me and the hair tie already on his wrist. He shakes his head a bit before coming closer.

"You see when you first came out I was preparing to remind you that it is hot out and shit, but you have actually beat me to it" he whispers his eyes dropping from my face to my exposed skin.

I put my hands over the front of my thighs, not that it does anything. He's probably not even looking there.

"Conner please stop staring- I know they're gross to some people but I'm fucking dying of a heat stroke everyday" I groan attempting to add a playful push.

"Oh I am definitely not repulsed" he chuckles. That's when everything flips around. My face goes red at what he could possibly be initiating.

"What does that mean?" I ask suddenly nervous. His face changes a no longer cocky look as he looks me up and down again. Reaching forward he tugs at one of my curls leaning forward until we are almost nose to nose.

"Maybe you should ditch the sweatshirt too. I'm glad you're not wearing sweats, but still even a sweatshirt is a bit much" he tells me and I groan at the sudden change of topic adding more distance between us.

"Conner I'm fine- I'm use to it by now" I remind him but he doesn't exactly like that answer giving me one of his dumb pouts.

"Fine let me do your hair" his fingers are already running though it nicely not some rough scratch either. He's tender like he might actually care. I look up at him with wide unexpecting eyes and my breath catches in my throat as my face begins to heat up. God damn it, I probably look drunk.

With that thought I hurry to whip myself around holding back a hiss as it ends with him pulling my hair a bit.

"Sorry" he apologizes rubbing the spot for a few seconds.

"It was my fault don't apologize" I tell him hiding my smile. He starts to pull all my curls back and I cringe when he manages to get them all. None framing my face the way I like. He makes it tight, but keeps it as a low pony my curls making it look more like a bun then anything else.

"Turn for me" he whispers and I feel my breath hitch once again as I turn, willing myself to keep my hands down. I turn hesitantly not making eye contact just yet. I don't want to be rude and pull my hair out of the ponytail. The one he's been practicing so hard to perfect.

"Let me see" he for some reason whispers voice deeper at such a low volume. I look up just in time to see his face tense. I take a small step back stumbling over Will's case. In seconds a hand grasps my sides and I stand straight again taking his hands off of me.

"Sorry didn't want you falling and hurting yourself" he adds his eyes sweeping over my body as I internally cringe. I should have sucked in our something. He grabbed all of my fat. Fuck I need to start working out that was embarrassing.

"It's fine, thanks" this is so awkward. Roommates. Just staring. Having a timid shy conversation. He takes a step forward closing the gap I had accidentally made when I got scared.

"I gotta finish your hair" he explains a hand already up.

"What do you mean?". Did he not like how he did. I would keep it no matter how horrendous it makes me look. His fingers pull a few strands out in the front, letting them gently fall over my face.

"That's how you like it right?" He asks continuing to lightly pull at a curl.

"Yes, thank you" I hate him. Why is he doing this too me?

"Of course, favorite part ot my day" he teases as I turn away to grab my things once again having failed to get everything earlier. Is he flirting,? He seems like it. Am I crazy?  Maybe I'm reading into it wrong? I think I'm decently attractive. Wish I could lose a few pounds. I wasn't expecting him to be into guys either that's another big thing.

When I finally get everything I turn back to find Conner sitting on his bed, his legs spread as he just stares at me. He doesn't bother trying to look away. Was he staring when I was bent over? Fuck he probably saw the stretch marks. Okay... well he said he wasn't repulsed and doesn't seem grossed out.

Pulling my backpack over my shoulders I walk over to him keeping the eye contact even though I really want to shy away. Wait now I need to somehow start a conversation. I was the one to come over here. I had stopped in front of him a few steps closer and I'd be in between his legs.

He looks up at me with a very smug look before his eyes drop to my thighs I look away embarrassed and hope he's seriously not disgusted by me. That he actually enjoys them as much as he seems to be letting on. Ah perfect idea!

"When you head to your class can you bring Will. You always seem to pass by me while I go to my little hiding spot and I plan on playing for a bit outside" I ask watching his eyes come back up to mine.

He clears his throat first before speaking his voice husky and low and it makes me want to fucking punch a wall because I find it so fucking hot.

"Yeah, I'll bring Will" he tells me and I smile before reaching forward and messing with his perfectly styled hair. He lets out a startled noise not expecting it and I quickly turn and speed away.

"Bye!" I make it quick slamming the door behind me and hurrying off to class. As soon as I get outside I feel like all eyes are on me. I know they're not. I wish I could tell the anxious feeling to go away, but it won't. I guess I need to focus on other things. Like fucking Conner.

Does he like me? Maybe he just wants to fuck with me. Or actually just fuck me. I haven't done that kinda stuff. I haven't even had my first kiss yet. I wouldn't mind Conner being my first kiss. He's insanely attractive and funny and well nice to me. He can take a joke when I bash him and does the same for him.

Still I don't want him to just use me... I want to be in a relationship.

Callum you don't even know if he's actually in to men at all?! Maybe this will be our new dynamic just flirting back and forth?