You Play the Field - I Play the Strings

Chapter 51

"I don't like it," Connor murmurs, lying back on my new dorm bed. The university had relocated us to a different room, explaining their discomfort with the idea of us staying in the same one. Despite the inconvenience, the silver lining was two weeks off without any academic repercussions. During the first week, Connor and I stayed with his family, and in the second, we settled into our new dorm.

"I know you don't like it, but we only have to sleep here for a few more months, then we can start looking for apartments, okay?" I remind him, perched on the edge of the bed while he sprawled out on his stomach. My fingers run through his hair, an attempt to soothe my overworried boyfriend to sleep.

"Yeah... you're right... always right," he trails off, his eyes closing as he snuggles further into my blanket.

Both of us, along with the university, tried to maintain a facade that nothing had happened. I mean the school of course issued a statement, surveys about mental health and safety circulated, and life continued, though the aftermath of the incident stayed with us... with me. I was still in the process of healing, unable to lift heavy objects, but the ability to play the guitar had returned. On the other hand, Connor is still only able to work out with 5-pound weights. He hates it. With a passion.

Glancing down, I see my boyfriend peacefully asleep, prompting a content smile. Despite his new overly protective attitude, I appreciated the concern. Once he softly started to snore, I stood up, checked my pocket for my phone, key, and the flyer I'd found earlier, and retrieved my guitar from his bed. Silently tiptoeing out, I closed the door gently, and jogged down the hall, taking the elevator to put enough distance in between. Just in case he woke up. If I'm far enough away he can't forcibly drag me back in the room. Well I would go willingly because I don't want either of us to tear our new injuries.

This crazy idea of basically running away from Conner began when I stumbled upon a flyer advertising an audition. It is for a talent show, kind of. It's for a good cause they're donating all proceeds to a charity. Plus Conner has been trying to get me to get out more and do something. He's wanted me to do something with my music and now I'm going to do it.

I secretly kinda wanted to surprise Connor, so I chose not to share my intentions, anticipating potential disappointment. What if I told him about it and then didn't get in. God it would be so embarrassing. He'd try to tell me it is okay and that I'm actually amazing so they suck. I guess u don't even know. It would suck. At least now if I don't get it I can just ignore it and pretend it did not happen. So yes this can possibly be great. There is a kinda big drawback and that is that the venue is a 30-minute walking distance.

Once finally getting out of the building and past the many sympathetic stares and words I pause in the parking lot. I pulled out my phone and the flyer, quickly searching the theater's address. As expected, a 30-minute walk awaited me. A deep breath preceded my exhale, mentally preparing for the journey. Perhaps, I might shed some weight along the way. The regret of not preparing more for this opportunity gnawed at me; I could have like wanted up for this ahead of time. a 30-minute walk there and back. Self-deprecating thoughts echoed in my mind. Many that I tried to get rid of and be better about it. My fat fucking legs are going to fail me.

"Okay, you got this," I motivate myself before embarking on the walk. Although the audition had started an hour ago, the scheduled time span was from 3 to 6. Confident I would make it in time I decided to push anxiety to the side for a moment. While I still could.

If I end up like actually making it in and this walking back and forth becomes a normal thing I might have to purchase some sort of headphones to listen to some sort of music on my way there. Music would probably speed the long walk up a bit. My intent is to sing and play. No backing out.