You Play the Field - I Play the Strings

Chapter 34

He had hugged me. He had actually hugged me goodbye. I got a solid 'Goodbye Callum. You're a good one. I'm sorry for how I treated you' I got all of that from his dad. So now here I'm sitting on the ground still flabbergasted by it.

Conner was a few minutes late to his practice after our long drive, so after he got the suitcases up the stairs he bolted.

At first I had just worked on my song but then it made me sad that I couldn't play along. So then I moved to the floor, unpacking both mine and Conner's suitcase. It kinda dawned on me half way through mine. I need to make my decision. Ask about it or no?

I guess I sorta already made my decision. I'd rather him be contents and happy with me instead of guilty and embarrassed. What if he dumps me because he's so embarrassed. I mean his dad had to have said it for some. It could be the reason why he suspected that I'd be so bad. My looks.

I had been folding Conner's clothes and now found myself holding his shirt scrunched up to my chest as the door opened. My eyes go wide and I look over to see Conner walking in.

"Hiya" he yawns shrugging off his shoes and coat.

"How was it?" I ask going back to unpacking.

"Good very tiring. After a week I'm out of shape. Why are you unpacking without me silly" he sits on the ground with me.

"Just wanted to do something and this helps. I assumed you'd go right to bed? Aren't you sleepy?" I reach over to touch his now damp hair.

"Very but I can't let you do this by yourself" he tells me as I give him a look.

"You do so much for me. Too much for me. I never do anything" I remind him.

"Says the one who spent over $200 on shoes for me" he turns to glaring and I rub the back of my neck sheepishly a proper blush on my face.

"You bought me a necklace and you always pay for dinner and drive me places. We are not having this argument. My two hundred dollars is nothing" I lay my head back on his shoulder and he reaches his arm around so that his hand rests on my shoulder but slowly glides up to thumb at the skin under the collar of gym my shirt.

I close my eyes and his hand moves up splaying around my neck before sliding into my shirt and rubbing over my chest.

"I love you... so I'm going to try and convince you to let us do this tomorrow and go to sleep now" he whispers. I try to fight it but groan with a yawn.

"I love you too... I already miss your old bed though. It's hard trying to fit on one of our beds. I need the warmth though it's too cold without you" I shrug.

"And because you love cuddling me?" I very dramatically think it over looking between him and the ceiling.

"Come on butthead let's get in bed" he moves away and I sigh folding and putting the shirt back into the suitcase before plugging my phone in and following him to my bed since mine was actually made.

He pulls open the blanket and jumps in holding it open for me. I smile before sitting on the bed trying not to show how badly it affects me when the bed dips. Conner lays down and drops the blanket, instead running his hand back up my shirt. I stiffen up and he scoots closer to me pressing his lips to my forehead.

"Cally baby is something going on in your head?" I groan and scoot into him more wrapping my arms around him.

"I swear I'm eating-" he cuts me off sitting up a bit his hand staying on my side.

"Not that- yes I'm worried about that. God I'm so worried about that, but there is something else? Every time you zone out you seem as if you're battling yourself in your head. Somethings going on. Can you tell me? Get something off your chest?" He asks. I stay laying down while he sits up completely.

His hand stays on me at all times giving me comforting rubs and squeezes as I stare at the sheet under me.

"I'm scared" I hate the way my voice breaks. I'm not weak and I'm not pathetic. I shouldn't be crying over some boy. Some boy I've known what, 6 months. I've known him 6 months. Kinda hated him the first month and now here I am scared he doesn't actually want me for me.

"Scared? What's scaring you prince? Can I help at all" I reach over and wrap my arms around him resting my head on his lap. This forces his hand out of my shirt so instead he moves to play with my hair. I bite my lip trying to fight back the words I want to honestly scream out.

"I don't want it to be true Conner. Your dad he said that I look like all your exes. I don't want to be some conquest or something you'll throw away. I'm scared" I whisper sitting up and away from him.

"I can't stop thinking about it. The thoughts won't leave my head just constantly nagging. Like what if he finds some other person who looks like me but you know looks better. Which wouldn't be hard considering I'm some f-" a hand clamps over my mouth and my eyes go wide while it sets in what I almost just said in front of him. I let my gaze meet his and he looks furious. Within seconds I'm shoved down onto the bed my back pressed into the bed. My hand leaves my mouth as he stays over top of me still looking absolutely pissed. Is he mad I found out or mad that I even thought of that. Hopefully the latter.

"You stop right there. First off you are not any of those bad things that were about to be sad. Don't ever say that about yourself. Don't even fucking think it. Cal, baby. You're so perfect, handsome, smart, funny, talented, fucking beautiful. I say this too much but I want to worship you! Praise you in any way I can." I open my mouth to say something else, but he throws himself out there again.

"You look nothing like my exes. My dad was saying that shit to get under your skin. He's an asshole. God damn it I love my dad so much, but he is such an asshole. He will be so much better if you decide you want to meet him again but for now fuck that stupid man. For my exes- Jameson is 6'2 tan with short blonde hair and Willow is a woman for starters. She's got straight black hair and is quite literally black. She looks nothing like you and he looked nothing like you. I'll show you pictures baby. I promise that was a stupid ploy at trying to get you to leave" he settles my nerves almost immediately because I believe him. I believe him just like that. I don't know why this is my breaking point, but I lose it. I throw my arms around his neck, and bury my face into his neck trying to breathe.

"I'm sorry. I know you're tired. I know I just... thank you. I don't need any pictures. I believe you. I just really needed to hear it from you. Thank you" he wraps his arms around me hoisting me up. I refuse and he doesn't like that. It is a silent fight which does make me laugh through my tears until I give in and sit on his lap.

Conner smiles happily and puts a hand back into my hair making sure I can see him before he covers my face in loving kisses.

"Talk to me about these things. Don't hide them. I'll set it straight. I love you remember. I love all of you." I surge forward kissing him hungrily because fuck he's too perfect.

He groans and I don't hold back as I kiss him deeply getting just as much passion back from him. When I do pull away I return the favor from before leaving kisses all over his face. He hums content and with that grabs the blanket and puts it over his legs before carefully laying us back, me still on his lap.

"Conner!" I yelp but he continues to snuggle into my pillow pulling the blanket up over the both of us. I slowly start to roll off ready to cuddle into his side but he keeps me still.

"At least let me fall asleep, then you can move. I like having you on top of me. Feels nice and warm" he explains with a yawn. I sigh but nod hating the way my fat presses against him. Or the way my thighs seem to stick to him.

"Thanks for talking to me" a hand creeps up the back of my shirt. I nod resting my chin on his shoulder.

"Thanks for loving me"