Depression?

10. Mend My Heart

All I can think is I hate you;
I hate everything you've put in my life.
I hate wishing that every day was my last.
I'm just sick of all of this strife.

I can't believe you're like this;
If only I'd seen it before.
If I had known sooner,
I wouldn't be bound by the law.

The person I loved was so different.
You're nothing like that person now.
You've fooled me alright, I tell you;
Why don't you just take a bow.

To think that for you I tried to live
When every bone told me I don't belong.
To think that for you I forgot all else,
And I even wrote you a song.

Well now honey you ain't so sweet,
Your smile has long been lost.
If I had been less in love,
Would it have had this cost?

What was it I did that's made you sour?
What has made you do this to me?
Because even though I did things wrong,
The reason for this I don't see.

You told me that I deserve more,
And now maybe I think you're right.
But for you I put so much in,
It just sucks that for me you won't fight.

So at last to you I say goodbye.
Trust me I need you no more.
Maybe one day you'll sort your problem
And mend the heart you tore.

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My husband left again. I guess this time I kind of blamed him for what was happening. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband very much, I'm just so emotionally connected to him that everything he does affects me. I'm pretty sure he hated that. I've been getting pretty sick of feeling like I've been in this alone this whole time. It just feels like he doesn't care. Leaving and telling me he doesn't want me anymore really isn't helping that problem. I'm trying to let go of him for his sake. I'm trying to let him move on with his life if that's what he really wants. It's just so hard. I care about him too much. I love him so much, I don't want to let him leave. It's even worse because he won't take back his feelings for me or anything, so I'm stuck here trying to forget a guy who still tells me he cares. None of this is helping my emotional state at the moment.