Why r u dreaming?

CHAPTER 13

Tutor pov

"Why can't you love me? Is it that hard?  I'm tired of denying it, of planning what to do, what to say. I'm afraid of losing you and  couldn't bear it. Why does it all have to be so complicated? I dreamt about you. I dreamt that we loved each other fondly. And when I wake up nothing was as it was, I couldn't move on from that dream, it made me realize I've liked you since a long time ago. I didn't want to accept it, I thought the dream clouded my judgment but no. I realized only you can make me feel safe, you give me the courage no one else can. You held me in my worst moment, you helped me without asking anything back. You tease me all the time but I know what's behind your teasing, don't be scared of your feelings, don't deny it please. I must look desperate right now but I don't care, I don't. If I can't love you and  you can't love me back I prefer you thinking I'm crazy. I don't know how you feel, I can't read your mind, but the way you're treating me gives me hope. So tell me right now if you can't love me so I can try to move on. I can't force you to love me but I can't force myself to not love you either. Why can't you just tell me how you feel inside cause how you act keeps confusing me."   I managed to say in one breath, with tears running on my cheeks and hoarse voice. I say it out of impulse, and desperation after all those sleepless nights full of our memories.

Maybe it isn't the right way of doing it, I should've waited for him to develop some feelings or accept them. He has been looking shocked the whole time I was speaking, what was I expecting with this sudden desperate speech? 

I can't look at him right now, tears are still falling and I'm sobbing like a baby, the intensity of the love we had in my dream stayed with me when I woke up and stirred up my life and myself.

In a blink of an eye he gets closer, takes my face in his hands and wiped the tears "Don't cry please, it breaks my heart" 

We're face to face when he does the unexpected: he gives a gentle kiss on my eye, lips brushing my skin, then another one on the other eye. He moves to my cheeks and places one kiss on each one right where my tears are. I blink fast trying to process what he just did, unable to talk or move.

"I do like you Tor, I've been trying to make you understand my feelings for so long. But you're stubborn and couldn't see. Your dream must have been really nice to get you like this, but I'm glad you realized. Can we stop the teasing, the half confessions and the runaways now? I can love you Tor if you let me"

His hands are still cupping my face and I can't resist anymore, I place my lips on his for a fast peck. I can't believe what he said. I don't know how to answer so I hope he understands my response like this. 

But I guess he does cause he moves one hand to my waist and pulls me closer, we both close our eyes and the distance between us. Our lips move on their own, they taste everything they can like they missed each other so much they never want to forget the taste and feeling if they're separated again, one of my hand pulls his hair while the other grips his hand resting on my cheek and then moves to his shirt to clench it . I missed holding him and by how he's clinging on me it feels like he missed me too.

"Tor we're still in the street, everyone's probably enjoying the show but maybe this is not the right place for this" he suddenly says pulling away

Damn, he's right, we're in front of my building. I look around panicking but luckily it's evening and there's not a lot of people passing from here, plus we're hidden by columns too. 

I look back at him blushing a little, oh no now I feel embarrassed. I look around avoiding his eyes trying to find words to say  "So..." 

"So will you let me love you Tor?" 

Now I'm definitely blushing while trying not to smile too wide and nod 

"I can't hear you answer.." he puts his face down to face me since I was looking at my feet

"You really like be cocky like this" I snap and he laughs before pulling me again in his arms hugging my waist "I do. But I'm still waiting for your answer"

"Wait was the answer?" I tease him smirking to joke around a little bit

He laughs loudly and shakes his head "I won't ask again, no matter how much you tease me Tor. This is my game, not yours."

"Well then.." I start saying while moving away from his body "this is my body, not yours" I raise an eyebrow and tilt my head. I can play games too, and I'm gonna show him after all the teasing he put me through. 

"You're right" he takes a step closer "But it can become mine" 

I blush violently and hit him on the shoulder "P'Fight!"  I yell

He chuckles and suggests to go upstairs to start the tutoring he came for. I can't believe we're finally back together. Wait, are we?

"Wait P'Fight, so what are we now?" 

He gives me an interrogative look, comes closer again and starts patting my head  "Mmm I guess we're dating, or you already want marriage?" 

"Stop joking P'Fight!" I whine 

"But you're so cute when you blush, did I ever tell you you have the chubbiest cheeks I've ever seen and they're adorable" he pinches my cheeks making me blushing again. 

Is it a good idea to date him? Will it really be as it was in the dream?

Next day

I need to talk with Zon, I haven't heard from him for some days and I wonder why he hasn't told me about him and Saifah 

"Zon, where have you been. You disappeared"  I exclaim when he picks up the phone

"Oh sorry Tutor, I totally lost track of time, I've been in my room writing the novel for 2 days, I got to the music festival part, I wrote half of it basically" he answers 

"Have you gone insane, how can you write that much, go outside, calm yourself that nobody's chasing you. But other than that how come you didn't tell me that you and Sai are now dating?"

"Oooh I forgot, I wanted to tell you but then started to write and I don't know what happened, I got lost into it. But I think I need a pause, I'll take the half novel tomorrow at university so you'll read it and tell what you think, will you?"

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Hi readers! How are you? You like how the story is going? 

I wanted to tell you we still have left more or less 10 chapters, I know it looks like we're at the end but there's still quite some things that need to happen😉

(prepare for some angst next chapters)

Also I just started another ff, a Mewgulf au, if you'd like to take a look I hope you'll like that too 

See you next chapter! ❤️