Her Mask (Shikamaru x Oc)

Chapter Forty-Seven

After about two hours team ten had finally had enough training. Shingami wasn’t but everyone else was because they just couldn’t keep up with her.

Shikamaru had been so out of it ever since he’d picked her up.

He meant to be more professional about it but failed once he heard Shingami stutter.

He’d never heard her do that before and if he was going to be completely honest with himself.

It was really cute.

After that thought, if somehow possible his face got even redder.

Shingami was unbothered; it was just the initial surprise that had gotten to her. Other than that she was perfectly fine.

“Come on, Shikamaru.”

“What?”

“I’m walking you home, remember?”

He paused before slowly standing up taking up a pace to keep up with her.

He turned around momentarily to look back at the rest of the team. Asuma winked and choji gave him a thumbs up while he munched on some type of chips. Ino squealed and that simply said it all.

Shikamaru turned away and looked at Shingami, after a few moments of silence between them the girl spoke up. “You did good today.”

“What do you mean? You're the only one that really did anything.” She slipped her mask off her face and smiled at him. 

“I wasn’t talking about the prisoner, You almost had me a few times.” She traced the edge of her mask, it wasn’t a complete lie, he was getting better. Thinking about how he put out the first attack and when she’d sneezed.

She looked at him from the corner of her eye. He was looking at his feet as he kicked pebbles out of his way. “Really?” 

“Yes. if you get a little faster and try some new things you may just get me.”

He nodded before stopping in his tracks as he felt a cold hand on his shoulder. He met her eyes.

“Shikamaru, I know I’m not the best teacher. I’d rather throw you into a situation that you need to find a way out of on your own, than explain myself.”

“It’s fine Shingami, it’s a good way to learn.”

Her hand slipped off his shoulder. “Is it though?”

She walked a little ahead of him and he followed right behind her.

“I’ve been teaching you the same way I was taught. But, at the same time, I’m not. And I will never do that to you guys.”

“What do you mean?”

“My father…”  Her eyes darkened ever so slightly. “He did not hesitate to do anything to myself and my brother. If he wanted us to learn something? It usually ended in blood.”

Shikamaru walked right up beside her. “You mean… He’d physically hurt you if you didn’t do something the right way?”

“Yes.” She looked him in the eye. “But I’m not him, Shikamaru. And will never be him. If you don’t want to do something, tell me. I will not force you to do anything and I will never put you in harm's way.”

She stopped looking him in the eye also stopping him with her hands. “Promise me.”

Despite the light blush on his face from Shingami touching his chest with her small hands even though one of them was holding her mask, he said what he had to say and he meant every word. “I promise, I’ll tell you. But Shingami. I trust you. I trust you with my life and I know you’ll never purposely hurt me.”

She didn’t say anything and they stood there for a few moments while Shikamaru gripped her arms gently.

“Thank you, Shikamaru.” She looked down at her feet. “I… I trust you too, with my life.”

They started walking again, but deep down Shingami knew her words meant nothing, no matter how much she wanted them to. Her life was not worth anything. And she did not deserve his trust after she had deceived him since the beginning.

______________

After shingami had left Shikamaru at his house she walked home on her own, lost in her thoughts. 

Her brother was the one that bugged her the most.

She trusted him blindly, then he left her. 

Alone.

Shingami crossed her arms.

It didn’t matter now. Someday when her team found out who she was. They’d leave too. At least it wouldn’t hurt as much. And she could forgive them easily because she understood why.

Her brother though? How could she ever forgive him for leaving? She loved him so much. He was all she had, and she was all he had.

He broke the promise he’d made to their mother.

Her hand slipped up to her necklace.

But part of her had already forgiven him. She was here, if he hadn’t gone, she wouldn’t be.

She opened the door to the house, Ibiki was standing in the kitchen talking to Anko and Genma who were sitting down at the table.

Without thinking too much she wrapped her arms around his waist hugging him not saying anything.

Ibiki instantly wrapped his arms around her, concerned.

“Shingami? Did something happen?”

“No,” she said quietly before letting go of him walking up the stairs to her room closing the door silently behind her.

She took her old tento off the wall and sat on her bed.

She gripped the blade tightly, cutting her hands without realizing it, watching her blood drip onto the floor, making no move to stop it.

“I can’t forgive you, not now.” her eyes watered up behind the mask. “...But I still love you… brother.”