Cigarettes and sunflowers

🦔Chapter 6🦔

The picture above has nothing to do with the story just wanted to draw attention to the very hetero actions.
Ok that's all enjoyyyy :)
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Also
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!!TW!!
Self harm
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Ok that's all for real this time
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When Louis woke up he had a pounding headache. It was strange since he didn't even get to drink last night but he went down his friend's stairs to get water and pain killers.

It was Wednesday so no one was here, everyone had gone to school. After the pain had subsided a bit he got his pants and jacket and headed home. By the time he had smoked his second cigarette Louis was at his house. It was nothing glamorous, but it wasn't complete trash. Very mediocre. Louis was fine with that though, never minded not having nice things.

What got to him was the quiet of the house, with his sisters at school and his Nan out shopping, it was very quiet. The house was always quite loud and hectic, and he found himself missing that chaos.

He shrugged it off and went to go shower, and the small, pretty, angelic boy named Harry floated into his mind. He thought of how innocent he was, how good he looked in his pretty skirts and dresses. He wanted him. Louis wanted Harry more than anyone but he knew he couldn't get close. He would hurt him and Louis would never forgive himself for hurting someone like Harry.

Wow he got distracted. Louis tends to get lost in his thoughts, having total disregard for reality, soaking in his thoughts. He was standing in the shower thinking about Harry for so long the water went cold. He felt the brutal cold cascading down his back, making his skin go numb.

He got out, wrapping a towel around his waist and walked slowly into his bedroom. Louis was stressed, and filled with anxiety. He wanted a release.

With that in mind Louis took out the box from deep in his closet and took out a razor. It had been two months since this last happened, he was trying to get clean.

Shamefully, Louis brought the razor up to his wrist and watched the blood pour out.

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That morning Louis stood Zayn up, not up for talking to him. He walked into the school feeling disassociated to reality, feeling shame, and guilt.

He wanted to speak with Harry. As Louis made his way to Harry's locker, he was planning on what he would say to him. He wanted to talk with him without giving Harry any information about himself. Louis would not get close.

He finally reached the locker, but no Harry. Louis just thought he went to first period early, but when he got there, no sign of the angelic boy.

The school day went like that, Louis just waiting for Harry to show, and being disappointed every time he heard the door open and didn't see Harry.

He missed him.

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End of chapter 6

Sorry this chapter is so short,
I'm still trying to figure out how the story is going to progress and what kind of character development is going to happen
But I will say that I am going to include a gender fluid character 🤭
Thank you so much for reading !!!
Love youuuu xxxxx

- Bee🦕