Unexpected Love Story ✔ [Taekook]

13. Why?

Taehyung's POV

"Sure, there are many ways that you can grip the paintbrush when painting, but there's this one method that every artist should know to get the most fluidity and sensitivity from each stroke," Mr Nam Do San lectures whilst holding a paintbrush in his hands.

 "Look at how I'm holding the brush. You should hold the handle as far back as you can. This might feel uncomfortable at first, but it provides the greatest degree of control over the brush since it allows you to paint with your whole arm, not just your wrist..."

I leave a sigh and place my paintbrush down, staring at the faraway hills. This Dosan guy is honestly good but I don't want to listen to his lecture right now. Seriously, I'm not in the mood to learn oil painting currently. After all, I cheated and I'm no good at this stuff.

I don't even want to look at these
Purple hills right now. I just want to be back at home. I hate it here! I lost my peace! I regret coming to this camp!

I close my eyes for a moment and then slowly open them, only to see Jungkook staring at me. He was sitting in the row just in front of me, three chairs away from me, beside Rowoon. I frown at him and he looks away, biting down on his lips.

Averting my eyes back to my canvas, I grab the paintbrush again and start examining its structure. My gaze instinctively falls on Jungkook after a few seconds. He seemed to be still biting his lips. Fuck!

Why? Why did I happen to sit near him on the bus and then share a room with him? Why did I have to find out his secret? Why on earth did he and I even have to come here and meet like this? Just why? Why all this unnecessary heartache right now?

I thought loving Ara was painful. But it never felt like this.

And I thought I was straight. I'm fucking gay for him!

Ahh..this is truly frustrating!

"Hey! You, blue shirt guy.." Mr Nam calls. I look up from my canvas to see him looking at me.

"Me?" I ask.

"Yes, you. What's wrong? You don't look good."

"Er...nothing...I'm having a small headache," I reply.

"Oh! Do you want to go and rest inside the tent for a while?" He asks.

"Yeah.." I nod.

"Okay, you may go," he waves his hand, dismissing me. I mumble a 'thanks' and get up from my chair, quickly walking in the direction of the tents.

Once I step inside my tent, I lie down on my mattress, closing my eyes. I was actually having a headache. I didn't get enough sleep the last two days, especially yesterday. I didn't sleep at all last night. Jungkookie was shivering and mumbling things in his sleep and I was trying to comfort him. I don't know what or whom he meant but he kept saying 'Please don't leave me alone' throughout the night. He would calm down when I whisper sweet nothings in his ear and run my fingers through his hair but then again he starts trembling when I'm just about to fall into sleep.

But he doesn't remember anything once he wakes up. And once he wakes up, he starts acting like the happiest kid in the world, smiling and showing off his bunny teeth. Nobody probably knows how fragile and pathetic he really is. Yesterday I wanted to tell him, I'm here and I'm not going to leave him alone but I couldn't. If only he was a girl...

At some point, I drift off into sleep and only wake up when Yoonjae calls me at noon, asking me to have lunch. He had brought our lunch to the tent. Rowoon thankfully doesn't return. Maybe he is avoiding me, good.

While we have lunch, Yoonjae tells me Mr Nam made them paint a portrait of the sunrise we watched this morning and this time Min Hyuk's painting was selected as the best. I wonder what happened to Jungkook. He should have been the best.

I also learn from Yoonjae that afternoon we are having another section with Mr Nam on pencil drawing. I decide to attend this class and we return to the ground at 2:30 p.m.

I see Jungkook sitting at the same seat from morning and I look in the opposite direction as I walk to my seat. I catch him turning around and looking at me a few times during Mr Nam's lecture. I too couldn't help but steal glances at him, no matter how hard I tried to control myself.

"Now I'd like you guys to pair up into groups of two. Let's do a group project," Mr Nam says after an hour's lecture, discussing a few tips and techniques in pencil drawing.

Rowoon instantly pairs up with Jungkook. I find myself getting angry and frustrated as I watch Rowoon's excitement. He makes Jungkook stand up and then puts their chairs opposite each other whilst smiling at him.

"Hey, Taehyung! Can I pair up with you?"

I look up to see Bora smiling at me. I just nod to her and she sits down on the chair beside me.

"Now, your assignment is.." Mr Nam says. "One of you be a model and the other sketch your partner's face."

"Hey, do you want to draw?" Bora asks me.

"No, you draw," I tell her whilst watching Rowoon and Jungkook.

"Okay.." Bora nods and starts sharpening her pencils.

Jungkook then turns and looks at me and I quickly avert my gaze towards the distant hills.

"Taehyung, look at me," Bora says. I turn my face to her and she smiles at me, holding the pencil against her drawing sheet.

"Look straight! And what's that frown about?" She says after some time. It's then I realise I was frowning at Rowoon. Cause Rowoon was the one drawing and Jungkook was acting as his model.

Why is Rowoon drawing when Jungkook is the better artist?

"You look so much more handsome usually. What happened today? Is it the headache?" Bora asks.

"Maybe.." I mumble.

After she resumes drawing, I again tilt my face only to see Rowoon touching Jungkook's chin. Jungkook looks a bit uncomfortable.

"Taehyung, hey! Here.."

"Yeah.." I nod and turn my face back.

After some time, Rowoon again touches Jungkook's face, moving it left and right and up and down. I find myself fisting my hands, watching him laugh whilst touching Jungkook. And Jungkookie sure doesn't look happy.

Why the hell does he need to touch my bunny's face? Is there any way to make this jerk disappear?

"Taehyung.."

I sigh and look back at Bora. She looks annoyed now. "Can you raise your shoulder a little bit and keep your eyebrows straight?" She asks. I nod and sit up straight.

For some time, I try to sit straight and control myself from tilting my head in Jungkook's direction but my anxiety finally gets the better of me. And when I turn my face I see Rowoon tracing his finger along Jungkook's cheeks and chin. My hands fist into balls. And then suddenly he touches his lips and Jungkook squirms in his seat. I feel my blood boil inside my veins.

A touch on my chin and I smack the hand away, jumping up from my seat.

"Taehyung!!" Bora gets up from her seat looking hella angry. "What's your problem? Why did you hit me?!"

"I'm sorry," I leave a sigh, brushing my hair backwards. I was feeling mixed emotions- anger, frustration, embarrassment, surprise and disappointment at myself. Everybody was now looking at me.

"Mr Nam, I can't work with him," Bora announces.

"What's wrong?" Mr Nam comes towards us.

"He wouldn't sit straight and co-operate with me. He keeps looking elsewhere and just now when I was trying to tilt his face back, he hit me!"

"Did you really?" Mr Nam asks me in a gentle tone.

"I'm sorry," I say. "I keep getting distracted. I really didn't mean to smack her hand."

"Okay, I suggest you go and take a walk or drink some water," he tells me and turns to look at Bora. "Miss, are you okay sketching my face instead?"

"Yeah, sure," she nods.

Once again, I mumble a 'thanks' to Mr Nam and quickly run out of the ground. Tears well up in my eyes and my vision becomes blurry as I run towards the big tree far away.