Facade

Chapter 18

    My hand was in Philip's as we stepped into the ballroom. It was beautiful as usual, but for once I wasn't thrilled to be there. Because Philip was my companion and I had to pretend to love him, I wished the day would fly by.

    Mother stood on my other side, wearing a delighted expression. She had been happy to see Philip and I together. In fact, she was thrilled. I began to wonder if she was being blackmailed by Philip as well, so that was why she wanted me to marry him.

    The three of us walked over to our usual table and sat down. Philip sat next to me, moving his chair so that he was too close to me, and I felt my heart drop. He made me so uncomfortable, but there was absolutely nothing I could do.

    I looked at his face partly covered by a silver mask and he smirked smugly, causing a fury to build up in me. My eyes flew away, knowing I had to stay calm. If I were to do anything to upset him, Mother's secret would be out and that would be the end of my family.

    "Diana," Mother said, bringing my attention to her. "I'm going to go chat with King Henry."

     Nausea hit me and I nodded, looking away quickly. Any thought of King Henry made me feel that way. But realizing it wasn't just him in the picture, I shut my eyes, wishing I hadn't learned Mother's secret.

    "You know by chat, she means something else," Philip sneered, once Mother was gone.

    I whipped my head to glower at him, too upset over everything to care. He seemed taken aback by my hateful look, but soon he scowled.

    "Play nice, Diana," he said, smirking. "Or else her secret will be out and she will be known as a slut to the world."

    I hated him. I hated him and how viscous he could be, and I wanted nothing more than to run away from him. But sadly, I couldn't do that. Not when Mother's reputation was on the line.

    So bitterly, I forced a smile that seemed to please him.

    "Good girl," he said, smiling to himself. "You have a lovely smile."

    Ignoring him, I brought my attention to the dance floor. It was still everything I remembered it to be. So beautiful, so graceful, and filled with so many happy pairs. A genuine smile formed on my face and I thought about how even though my life had changed so quickly and vastly, the scene in front of me hadn't. My love for it hadn't either, which made it the only solid constant in my life.

    But then I suddenly thought about Alexander and every moment we shared in the ballroom. My heart broke at the very thought of him, knowing we could never be. Because I had to be with Philip, we had no chance. The thought of that hurt and I suddenly stood up, needing to be distracted.

   "I'm going to get a drink," I said, already stepping forward before Philip could answer.

   "Okay, I shall accompany you," he said, getting up.

   I rolled my eyes and soon Philip was at my side. He was grabbing my hand and I felt a chill run through me - not the good kind - and I focused my attention on the snack table, knowing I couldn't be rude to Philip. No matter how badly I wanted to forget about him, it seemed like I was trapped.

   We went to the snack table and I grabbed a cup, pouring myself a drink. Philip did as well, momentarily letting go of my hand, and for a mere second I felt like I could breathe. I didn't feel so anxious and I realized bitterly, that, that was going to be my life.