Tough Love

Chapter Sixty-Four

A/N: Ok, so due to the number of comments, follows and votes, I decided to post the little part I've already written as an early chapter. I seriously can't thank you guys enough for your overwhelming support. You guys have been awesome, truly. Thank you all for everything :)

Here's the next part & I hope you enjoy it.

Chapter Sixty-Four

Eli

It feels like hours since they rushed Dani away from me. In reality, it could only be a few minutes. I just keep thinking about what I could have done differently; what I should have done differently. I should have asked Ash to train with her; maybe she'd have had a fighting chance to get out of there before they almost killed her. I should have taken her to the precinct with me. I shouldn't have left her on her own. Hindsight really is 20/20 vision. I can't bring myself to think about actually losing her; not right now. She has to make it through this. She's already been through too much to end things this way.

I failed Dani again. I always fail her and she ends up getting hurt. Maybe she'd be better off without me. I don't even know how I'd cope without her now, but if it means keeping her safe, then maybe that's what I need to do. I have to make sure she gets through this and then maybe it's time to walk away. She's more confident than before and the medication is working, so maybe she can function just fine without me. I'm not going to lie, the thought of walking away from her stings more than a little bit. Having to see her every day at the precinct will be a killer, but I need to protect her. I obviously can't do a very good job of it when I'm with her, so maybe she has a better chance of survival without me.

I will find these people, and I will make them pay; even if I die in the process. There's no way I am going to let this rest or take this on the chin. Forget Captain Greggson and his investigation. I'm starting my own investigation and I will destroy the people who hurt my Dani. As I'm contemplating everything, I keep pacing the corridors. I don't want to sit still because as soon as I do that, it will all hit me like a ton of bricks. I can't cope with that right now, so I have to shut it out. I pace and wait until my cell rings. That's when I look at the time; just after 17:30. Geez, what are they doing in there? What's taking so long that someone can't come out and update me? Why can't my pops give me some information? The vibrating device in my hand brings me back to reality and I answer the call.

“Eli?! What's going on? Is there any news? I've just got back to the precinct and the Cap told me what went down. How is she?”

I shrug and then remember he can't see me, so I reply, “I don't know. They took her into theater and I haven't heard anything since.”

“I'm on my way. I have to lock up the weapons and then I'll be there.”

I don't reply. I just hang up. What can I say? I can hardly find words right now. Everything seems so trivial that it's not worth voicing. All that matters right now is finding out if Dani is going to survive. I pace a bit more and then I see a flurry of activity as Ash storms past a nurses station. I hear him almost shout, “I don't care what your policy is; I'm going to my friend. What are you going to do, call the cops? I hate to break it to you honey, but I am the cops. Just let me get to my friend and you won't have to worry about me again...”

Usually I would find Ash's comment funny, but there's nothing humorous about this situation. The nurse is red faced as she follows Ash. She steps up to me and breathlessly says, “I'm sorry, Lieutenant. I did try to stop him. Dr. Ramirez said you weren't to be disturbed until we had some information on your girlfriend.”

I stare through her, not realizing how rude I'm being. “It's fine. He's a friend.”

She nods with purpose as she shoots Ash a death glare and walks away.

Ash squeezes my shoulder and then I resume my pacing.

“Eli, have you even sat down yet?”

“No.”

“Why don't you just take a seat? Even if it's for 5 minutes. You can't keep pacing...”

“I can't, Ash. I can't allow myself to think right now.”

He seems to get the underlying message, because he doesn't press any further. In fact, he starts pacing next to me. I can feel a break down coming and it's not something I want to happen here, not even in front of Ash. I need to hold it together until I'm away from here. I can't lose it now because if I don't cry, I'll end up hitting something or someone. Neither of those options are appropriate right now, so I have to squash the feelings down and put a lid on them. It's not proper practice for a SWAT Lieutenant to lose his cool in the middle of a hospital, no matter what the situation is. It's at this point that I realize I'm still in full tactical gear. I don't even know if I can be bothered to take it all off. I don't want to do anything unnecessary until I hear some information about Dani. There's still no word when the Cap turns up. I glance at the time again and it's nearly 9pm. The Cap glances at me and then I hear him speak to Ash, “What's the news?”

“Nothing yet. They've had her in there from 1500 hours. We don't know what's going on.”

“Do you know what happened, Ash? Has he said anything to you?”

“Nope. He's said about 12 words to me since I arrived.”

Ash drops his voice but I can still hear him as he whispers, “Cap, I don't know what we're going to do with him if we lose her... He's only just hanging on as it is...”

“We'll deal with that if it happens. For now, we just have to hold on and hope that she'll be ok. The doctors obviously have no bad news or they would have already brought it out here. Just keep holding on to that.”

I can't listen to them talk about me like I'm not here, so I interrupt their little conversation. “Any ID on the guy in her apartment?”

“Yeah. His prints threw out an ID pretty quickly. Petrov Worden. He did time for possession, assault and solicitation. Nothing too recent though.”

As soon as I hear the name Petrov, it sparks a memory. Dani said the 'breathing man' was called Petrov. That makes me smile a little bit, despite the situation. She managed to hold it together enough to shoot the one who started all of this. No wonder she took so many shots. She probably saw red once she pulled the trigger for the first time.

“Early ballistics report?”

“Nothing yet. They're still processing the scene. That's going to take some time, according to Tom. He said it's a mess in there.”

“Yep.”

I don't need to elaborate on that. They'll see the crime scene photos, I'm sure. I just have to be thankful Dani was still alive when I got there, otherwise her naked body would have been in those photos too. I should be thankful for the small things, I guess. They're still going to have to take pictures though. I don't want my Cap or my colleagues to see those. One of the downsides of working in law enforcement, no privacy when the worst things happen to you.

My pops appears right in front of me, looking rather grim. My heart stops and I can't actually breathe. I know my dad well; and I know most of his expressions. This one doesn't look like he comes bearing good news.