His Queen

Chapter 11 : Beauty

Rhysands Point Of View:

Wind whipped through my black fur as my paws pounded on the forest floor. My bones ached each leap I took. I needed to think. I needed to get it together. All I could think about was 'her'. The way her eyes showed no fear, and her pink lips pressed together as she glared at me. Being in my wolf form only heightened those feelings that I had been pushing away since I first laid eyes on her. I was surprisingly worried for her and it caught me off guard. I was seldom worried for any one but myself or the safety of my pack. Onalee has already pulled me and my wolf into her grip and I only no one way out. Death.

I've been running up the Maine coastline for hours. Maybe even a day. Straight north along the rocky shore littered with sea weed and small yellow shells. Seagulls squawked and waves crashed. It was all background music to the beautiful lyrics that consisted of one name, Onalee.

No amount of running can get her from my head. No amount of hurting others can erase her. No amount of making her suffer was worth it. The Moon Goddess has cursed me with a mate and I had let everything fall apart. Now I had to live with the consequences. Killing her would not help but loving her wouldn't do much good either. I was a monster and no matter how hard I tried I could never tame that piece of me. The part of me that demand blood and suffering.

I had chased away too many people I loved because of being who I am. I was always left alone, to clean up the pieces of my shattered heart. Not matter how hard I tried to hide it loosing people always took its toll on me. It made me feel helpless, so I had to find other ways to stay in control.

I knew that I had to turn back at some point because other wise I would reach another pack boarder and have to talk my way out or kill.

My wolf form made a hasty cut to the water to cool off before going back. Our paws splashed into the cool water letting it calm our nerves. It lapped at our back fur and cleaned out the many cuts that lined the bottomed our paws. The slight sting was welcomed.

I allowed myself to get lost in the waves as it washed my world away. I wanted to start over, living in a world where I could have enveloped Onalee in my arms. A place where I could have spoiled her with love and affection. To bad my life was nothing like that. My life was a snarl of thorns and branches that even the sharpest weed clippers couldn't make a dent in.

After finishing off in the water I made the grueling trek back home however I purposely ran slower, stalling. As soon as I arrived back I would be swamped with paperwork, training reports, and most importantly the problem of dealing with Onalee. I couldn't put my thoughts together when it came to her. One second I was convinced that killing her was the best route but a few seconds later I considered letting her go.

As I neared the pack head quarters I slowed to a steady trot passing members of my pack milling around the meadow right next to the pack house. The pack house had been newly remodeled and it was a master piece of architecture. The outside was 7 stories tall, all straight lines with grays and blacks. Everything was symmetrical and the huge glass doors in the front were glossy as if they were just cleaned. Hundreds of modern apartments were inside and majority of the pack preferred to live there. However, I enjoyed my solitude and my own private residence was located a few miles away. It was my parents old home but I had made many updates to suit my lifestyle making it almost unrecognizable.

I passed the park as I went towards my house. Children played in their human forms as well as their wolf forms. They carelessly pranced around, having not a care in the world. I planned on keeping it that way. Children deserved to live life without the stress of worrying for their safety like I had. Children deserved to have loving parents like I never had. They deserved to grow up with only joy and fun. No matter how stressful my alpha duties became I always reminded myself of why I was doing what it was doing. It was for the helpless pups who needed a strong leader to protect them.