Belle | #1

20| Monachopsis

2 0

M o n a c h o p s i s 

(n.) the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place.

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Sad birds still sing.

– a u t u m n 

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It was amusing, to say the least, to see Ella slightly nervous.

Of course, she never made it that obvious – Julian was just the one who could see her fisted hands on her lap, and the tightness in her jaw. He wasn't lying to her when he told her that it was a shame the two of them didn't share any classes – he did see her around the hallways every now and then, which was how he essentially found out she was Calliope's friend when he talked to her that one time – but now that she was here, sitting on their lunch table, Julian really, really wished they shared even just one class.

"We're the same age, dummy," Ella said, for the sixth time to Reece, rolling her eyes. "We were together back in eighth grade."

Reece grinned. "That can't be true – I would never forget a cute face like yours ever."

Ella quirked an eyebrow. "Well, you did," she said, an octave of amusement in her voice. "Sad to know you don't remember my cute face."

Reece instantly panicked, his eyes widening at her. "What – no, Jesus Ella, listen –"

"It's alright Reece," Ella cut him off, grinning now. "I understand."

Julian could see Alexander and Calliope's intertwined fingers underneath the lunch table, and he smiled at himself, focusing his attention back on Ella and Reece. Ella looked extraordinary in blue – it brought out the dark chocolate of her skin, and the brown of her eyes – and Julian noticed the smidge of lipgloss on her lips too.

It hasn't even been twenty minutes since Ella and Calliope joined the table and Reece was already making it an absolute shitshow. Julian supposes it started off normal enough – Hello everyone I'm Calliope, and this is Ella – and Julian offered the two of them a small wave when they settled themselves down. Reece was the first one to send a small wink to Alexander, and Adam – who noticed that as well – instantly started talking about anything before Alexander had the chance to become embarrassed.

"Regardless," Reece emphasized, his customary smirk now on his lips, "I still think you're absolutely stunning right now."

Ella looked like she was going to laugh. "Thank you, Reece – I think you're funny."

Adam was quiet today, and it was quite odd because this was his first day back, but Julian thought maybe he needed some space. Adam had English right after this, so perhaps he was mentally preparing himself for the storm Evangeline had coming for him. Julian grabbed the remaining garlic bread he had in his bag and handed it to Adam.

"Eat up," he said, quirking his eyebrow at Adam. "I made those – just the way you like it."

Reece looked appalled. "Are you fucking kidding me Julian, those – those are one of my favourites –"

"I'll make you more today, you idiot," Julian sighed, pursing his lips. "We didn't see Adam for a minute – let him have it."

Adam even took the chance to stick his tongue out at Reece – You're a fucking shithead I can't stand you – and all the while, Ella was smiling, and Julian thinks that's the first smile he's seen from her the entire lunch break.