FakeKouji

𝓢1-𝓒13:𝓑𝓻𝓸𝓴𝓮𝓷 𝓫𝓸𝓷𝓭𝓼, 𝓢𝓱𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝓓𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶𝓼

Warning: Dark chapter ahead.If you can't deal with Kushida ch, I advise you to not read this...lol I think it's worse.

Horikita's POV:

So Cold

So Alone

So very lost

I am sitting here talking to the moon and the faint stars. 

This hoodie Ayanokouji-kun gave me is the only source of warmth on this lonely night.

I walk back slowly dragging my feet and opening my room door I drop on the be, utterly exhausted.

I force every step to the washroom. My face looks so hideous from the mascara lines running down my tear-stained face.

*Splash* *Splash*

This cleared up my face, maybe one day it can clear my ugly heart one day.

I drop down on my bed utterly exhausted from today. As I toss around my uncomfortable bed, I get these vague flashbacks of my disgusting self, all those pretentious things I did, the rudeness, those old wounds. 

My failures...my unachievable dream... 

I slowly drop into slumber in this dreadful night

FLASHBACK-10 years back(5 yr old Suzune)

"Suzune, let's play catch"

"Alright, Nii-san."

Nii-san is the best. He always plays catch with me. He brushes my teeth, combs my hair.

"Suzune, you have long shiny black hair. It looks good on you."

My mother had long black hair.....

Whenever I missed Daddy, he tucks me to bed. 

"Nii-san, can I ask you something?"

"What is it Suzune, ask quickly it's almost bedtime."

"Why doesn't Papa come home. I never see Papa, I miss him!!"

I hugged him weeping. 

He comes back home very late at night and leaves early. Papa never talks to me but only to Nii-san. 

I want to be a good girl too, I want hugs from Papa too. 

I also know Mama died, when I come out of Mama.

IT'S NOT FAIR. I WANT MAMA. I WANT PAPA...

He patted my head and said," There-There, Papa works extremely hard for us, you know that right?"

But he was lying....whenever he lies, he touches his hair.

I simply nodded. I am a big girl I am 5 years old.

 I can't cry, I can't be a burden more than I already am. 

But I want to know....even though Nii-san said me to never mention Mama...

"Do you miss Papa and...Mama?"

He looked at me with those scary eyes whenever I mention her. He looks at me like I am a monster in the Fairy tales.

He never says anything about Mama, I want to know more about her. 

He closed his eyes for a while...after that, I heard a sniffle. 

"It's nothing, go to bed."

He banged my bedroom door and left. The whole night I was awake tightly gripping my bedsheet hearing screaming and crying from my brother's room.