UNTIL HIM ( book 1)

Chapter 20 " Being around you drives me crazy."

NINAS POV

I just stand up calmly walking towards him avoiding eye contact, taking the small bottle of pills out of his hand and walk into the bathroom to see it cleaned..

I look at it confusingly as a couple minutes ago there was probably pill bottles, puke and maybe even the shower curtain on the floor then I hear him clear his throat.

I don't turn around but he still speaks.

" I thought you would want to come in here and it be clean so I cleaned it and then found you in your room.." he says and then I hear him hit the floor.

I glance behind me finding myself to still make sure he's okay. I still care about him even if he doesn't feel the same. But I hate to admit it. It makes me feel weak.

I see his body on the ground in a sitting position. I quickly look away. He looks exhausted. What should I care? Why do I care?

" I thought you didn't want to see me again." I find myself saying and he looks up and I just walk into the bathroom grabbing the glass cup I leave there everyday. I quickly run water into it and dump it out then filling it up again but this time drink a little bit of it.

" Being around you drives me crazy." He says and i look to the ground " but not being around you drives me crazier." He finishes and stands up. I drink a little bit more of the water opening the pill bottle and while shaking me head in doubt.

He's not convincing me this time. I can't get hurt again. I don't deserve too. I know what I deserve now. And i don't deserve to be on an obstacle of emotions every day. Just because he can't believe that I believe in us.

He walks in the door frame, I feel his eyes boring into the side of my face. I keep my eyes locked in the mirror. I almost cringe at my face.

The bags under my eyes. The small cut on my chin, and the tear marks staining my cheeks. My hair is kinda frizzy but it's put in a ponytail.

I pop one of the sour pills into my mouth and make a face but wash it down with water.

I finally look away from my unrecognizable face and shove past him the glass of water still in my hand. I walk down the stairs, flash not far behind me.

" Stop following me." I say and turn around.

" I was stupid." Flash mumbles looking at the ground completely ignoring my protest to not follow me.

"You were. And I don't want you to be here." I say still standing my ground he finally looks up. And we make eye contact since the fight.

" Nina.." he begins

" no." I say and continue to walk " if you stay here you'll convince me to love you again, and that has already been a mistake." I say and I hear him stop walking.

" Mistake?" He asks and I stop walking still looking ahead of me.

" yes. A mistake!" I say raising my voice

" Nina it wasn't a mis-" I cut him off

" So you're telling me that you didn't mean a single word you said? What not even 5 hours ago?" I ask and he walks closer and I put my hand up

" No." I say and he stops " I want you to get out." I say and he looks at with teary eyes

" Nina-" he starts

" I won't let you do this again. You hurt me. The person I thought who wouldn't and you did. So get out." I say and walk towards the living room door and open it.