Bad Boy Chemistry

54. Neon Blue Lights

Charlie's POV

"What?" I scoffed.

My stomach twisted with unsettled nerves.

"That's not... I don't.. I do not have a... 'thing' for you." I said, almost believing it.

He was clearly uncomfortable with the idea of me liking him, which I must admit hurt, so admitting that I did like him would probably just make him more uncomfortable. And how in the hell did Ryan come to the conclusion that I had a thing for Ace?

I guess it wouldn't take a genius.

Why wouldn't he just talk to me about it instead of telling Ace to stay away from me?

"Sure you don't." He smirked.

"I don't!" I protested.

"I see the way you look at me," His voice was gentle. "When you think I'm not watching."

The neon lights of the arcade cast him in a blue hue.

"You..... want....... me."

I gulped as literal chills rushed through my body.

Underneath neon blue lights, his green eyes gleamed. I felt my heart pounding against my rib cage.

I could have came clean right there and then, and told him the truth. But what would that get me?

A harsh rejection?

The whole 'we're just friends' speech?

A broken heart?

I didn't want him to reject me.

"No I don't." I lied, brushing past him to go and find Nora and get the heck out of here.

I felt the walls starting to cave in with every step I took. Why can't my life just go smoothly? I feel as if it's one thing after another.

And to make my life even more stressful, Ace clearly knew that I had a crush on him. So did Ryan.

If one more person knew we could throw a freaking party.

After finding Nora and saying goodbye to both Adelaide and little Adam, we exited the arcade in a not so orderly fashion and headed straight home.

When we arrived at home, I whipped out my phone and sent a text to Ryan saying that we needed to talk.

Once again, my nerves began to act up.

After changing into something warm, I waited out on the front porch for Ryan to arrived while playing out imaginary scenarios in my head of how this break up would go.

I didn't want to hurt Ryan. But, I can't keep doing this.

I cannot be with him.

All I had to do was take Nora's break-up advice, how hard could it possibly be?

Speaking of Nora's break up advice, I definitely need to ask for details on the girl she dated. But for now, I just needed to stay focused on breaking up with Ryan Woodsen.

The cold night air numbed against my face as I exhaled a breath that turned into fog beneath the porch light.

A pair of headlights appeared in the driveway before turning off.

Here goes.

I rose my where I had sat on the front porch and made my way down towards the car.

He got out of the car, his blonde hair tussling with the wind.

"Hi." He said, his breath visible in the air.

"Hi." I responded, my nerves twisting inside.

Okay Charlie, take a breath. Calm down.

You can do this.

He leant against his car as I approached him further.

"I, uh." I cleared my throat.

"You're breaking up with me, aren't you?" He asked.

Okay, is everyone partially psychic around here? Cause it's getting kind of freaky.

"I'm sorry." I said, frowning, shoving my hands into my pockets.

"It's because you like Ace, right?"

I sighed. "How did you know?" I asked.

"I see the way you look at him. You've never looked at me that way." His blue eyes made contact with mine.

"I'm really sorry."

He inhaled sharply, looking to the night sky, as if in thought.

I stood there awkwardly, waiting for him to say something. To say anything.

"I can't say that I'm surprised." He spoke after a moment of awkward silence. "I've never told anyone I loved them before." His voice despondent.

"I'm sorry." I apologised again. I took off the bracelet he gave me, the one that had his name engraved on it, which was pretty much the worst gift i had ever received, and I handed it to him.

He bit his bottom lip, shaking his head as he inhaled a sharp breath once again. "I don't think you are."

"Ryan-" I moved forward a step before he interrupted.

"It's okay Charlie. You've never liked me, not like I did you. I don't even know why you agreed to go out with me. I don't know, maybe you were just sad and lonely."

I scoffed, my jaw falling.

"I used to think you were the kindest person I'd ever met. But that's just a cover. If you never liked me, you should have said something instead of pretending everything was fine. You never should have stayed with me. It was just cruel of you." He kicked himself off of the wall. "Fuck you." He spat before hopping into the driver's side of his car. He started the ignition before quickly reversing out of the driveway.

I stood there, my skin ice cold, my breath rising in the bitter air like smoke and my eyes beginning to well with tears.

He thought I was sad, lonely and cruel?

I don't know why I took that to heart, but I did, and it hurt more than the cold biting against my cheeks.

At least it was over now.