After All | Lisa × Female Reader

Chapter 13 - Still Love Her

*Y/N's POV*

As a kid, when I was alone in my Dad's home, I used to think that it would have been better if I had a sibling. But when I did have one, it made my life worse. My stepbrother and I never got along, but God gave me Jisoo Unnie, Jennie Unnie, and Chaeng Unnie. They are like sisters to me. And now I am stuck on this date because of my sisters.

Katie had been going on and on about different things ever since we got here. I had lost the ability to actually listen to her words somewhere near her college days. The only thing I have properly heard is that her parents live in Canada, and she moved here with her little sister. And I realized the coffee shop where we are sat now has 27 tables in total.

"Y/N?"

"Hmm?" I was snapped back to the present when I heard her call my name.

"I have been talking about just myself. Why don't we talk about you too?"

Before I could answer, thankfully, her phone rang. Well, it seems like I really can't talk without getting interrupted.

I watched Katie get up from her seat and pick up the call. She was so cheerful just a moment ago, but now she seems scared. She's trembling. She looked vulnerable, so me being me, got up from my seat, and gently approached her. I tapped on her shoulder, and Katie turned around to look at me helplessly.

"What's wrong?" She fell to my chest and sobbed.

"Y/N... my sister..." Her voice trailed off.

So, long story short, Katie's sister tried to commit suicide. Of course, I couldn't just leave her, so I drove her to the hospital. The Doctors said that the cut wasn't that deep, so thankfully, her sister is okay. I was waiting outside her ward, and it seemed like there was a lot of yelling, and they were fighting. I saw her sister storming out of there. Both sisters were a crying mess. From what Katie said, her sister did it because her boyfriend cheated on her.

Seems oddly familiar.

Love is cruel. It shows you a mirage of how beautiful your life will look with that one person by your side. It will make you dream about the silliest things you can do. It will scare you with the thought of not being with that person. Love has the power to make a devil daydream, tame a beast and break a soul beyond repair.

It was not really my place to say anything, but the girl was barely twenty. I couldn't just go without talking to her.

I found her sitting by a bench in the garden, so I sat beside her.

She scoffed.

"I saw you with my sister. Did she send you here to advise me as well?"

I chuckled. "No. Who am I to advise you? I just wanted to say I think you are brave."

She looked at me questioningly.

I smiled. "Many people would say that people who commit suicide are stupid, but I find them courageous." I continued after a short pause, "But can't you use that courage to live your life?"

She became quiet. The girl looked pale, as if someone had sucked her soul out. I recognize that feeling. "I loved him." She whispered, sniffling.

"I know. It's okay. I am not going to say it will get any better because it won't. I have been there." I whispered the last part, but she heard it.

"What did you do?" She asked after a few minutes of silence.

"I left." I swallowed hard. "It wasn't easy. But I thought that's what I should do."

Do I regret it? I don't know. Would my life have been better if I didn't run away? I can't say.

"Do you hate them?" She asked.

I shook my head. "I hated myself for letting it happen. You know, sometimes we need to let go of the people we love for the sake of love." She was silent. "Don't hold on to it if it's hurting you. You don't deserve it." I guess she couldn't hold back her tears anymore. She cried on my shoulder, gripping my shirt.

I didn't say anything. I let her shed all the tears she had to.

"You can cry all you want. But once you stop, never cry over it again. You promise?" I asked her once she calmed down. She nodded slowly. "We may get stuck there, and that's okay. As far as we take a step towards the next day, we may be able to make a difference. I am sorry if I bored you. Your sister cares a lot about you. You have someone who looks towards you. I don't. So, please don't waste it. I hope you will take care of yourself." I patted her shoulders and got up, but she stopped me by my wrists.

"Do you... do you still love that person?"

I sighed.

"I am not going to lie. I do. She's the only one who still holds my heart."

"Why?"

"She loved me when I wanted it the most. She made me a better person. She is the only one who can hurt me." 

*Third Person's POV*

Y/N was telling the truth. She was still very much in love with Lisa. But she didn't come back to Korea to act on her hopeless romance or to see if she has got any chance with Lisa again. Instead, the reason was purely selfless.

Little did Y/N know Katie was listening to their conversation. She felt grateful towards the girl yet sympathetic at the same time. She had developed a liking towards Y/N ever since Rosè's birthday, but now it had grown as something more in Katie's mind. It pained her to know that she stood no chance with Y/N, but not as worse as the thought that Y/N was still waiting hopelessly.

And, of course, it was supposed to reach the girls the following day.

"Ms. Kim, how long have you known Y/N?" Katie asked the woman with heart-shaped lips.

"Why?"

"Do you perhaps know her ex?"

Yes, I do. Very well, actually. That's what the woman thought.

"What's wrong?"

"It seemed like Y/N is still in love with her." And then Katie went on to explain what Y/N told her sister. It actually didn't come out as a surprise to Jisoo because somewhere along, she knew Y/N still loved Lisa but was reluctant to believe it. After all, time can change people.

However, she didn't say anything to Lisa. Instead, the girls wanted to hear it from Y/N itself.

"Why did you come back to Korea, Y/N?"

Y/N sat in front of three pairs of eyes that watched her intently.

"Unnie, I–"

"Is it true that you still love Lisa?" Rosè asked.

"It is," Y/N replied, not looking at them.

"Y/N, what are you–" Jennie was about to speak, but the younger girl cut her off.

"Unnie, before you say something, trust me, I don't plan to interfere with her life in any way. In fact, I am trying my best to avoid her." Y/N sighed. "I tried to move on, Unnie. For the past seven years, I have been trying, but I just can't. Every day, the more I tried to forget about her, the more I was reminded of her. How can I just give up on what I feel for her when that's what drives me to fight every day? But when I heard the news of her engagement, I thought if I saw her being happy, I'd be able to move on. But it was said better than done." The younger girl swallowed hard as a teardrop rolled down her cheek. It didn't take much time for her to break down in front of her Unnies. "I promise, Unnie, I won't cause any trouble in her life. I just want to see her, that's all."

Jisoo sat beside her and patted Y/N's shoulders. She fell into her arms and cried.

"I just love her so much, Unnie." The younger girl mumbled.

"We know. We know. It's okay." Jisoo gently ran her hands in circles on her back.

Lisa was the junction of good and bad in Y/N's life. For Y/N, Lisa was the light and darkness of her life. She was her morning and night, pain and cure, war and peace, damage and resurrection, fire and shadow, and life and death.

The one who made Y/N fall in love, the one who taught her what love could be, the one to whom she gave her heart, the one who always made her heart flutter and feel special — it was all her; Lalisa Manobal.