eternal love (his pov 3)

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His pov,

I look at her in between classes,
Just to get a glimpse of her.
How can one not look at someone so beautiful?
Only an idiot would sit next to her and not look at her.

Every time I stare at her,
I see her smiling,
Talking to her friends,
Listening to the lecture.
I can't help but look at her with devotion.

She has so many layers to her personality.
She pretends to be happy
While making others content.
She hides so many things behind that bright smile.
Not even the ones closest to her would know
That she's not okay.

But on some days,
She fails to pretend.
Of course one gets tired
After days of putting up a deceptive appearance.
And on such days,
She holds onto the sleeve of her coat,
Her own hand,
Or the leg of a furniture around her.
She walks out of the class when things get worse.
It looks as if she's trying to not fall apart.

I see her doing it,
But I am helpless.
I can only talk to her
And give her ideas that she can try to get better.
She is grateful for what I do,
I wish I could help her more,
But I am not in the position to do so.

I want her to heal,
I am scared of getting too close to her,
I am scared that she might get affected by my darkness.
She is already losing her light,
and I can't afford her losing all of it because of me.

I sometimes feel like she's a wizard.
She somehow magically knows that I'm not okay.
She says that the vibes reach her.
I don't know how, but it's scary.
Or is this just how an intrinsic bond between two people exists?

I would love for us to be more than just friends.
But first I need to get better,
So that I am capable of helping her too.
I must be able to take away some of her pain,
And not escalate them.

I love her,
I know she does too.
I can tell by the glistening of her eyes.
I have lost my heart to her.
I am glad that she's in my life,
She will always be my eternal love.

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