Two Lines

fourteen

"Happy Birthday."

"How do you know?"

Yes, how would he know? Just how dare he know? Wasn't it disturbing for a person to know about a stalker, to be informed about the things he's doing behind person's back. And wasn't it wrong?

No, it's not.

"Err... I saw your registration in students list in office."

Yes, he was the James Bond. He did it quietly, sneaking in and seeing the details of her. But before he could read anything more than her name and DOB, the clerk saw him. The red welts hiding inside his shirt were rewards of shame. He hid about the prize he got from the clerk. James Bond wasn't ashamed of his deed though.

"And just like that you stole information?"

"Look, Kanak, don't get me wrong--"

"Shut up!"

A sharp sound of soft skin hitting another was the last essence of that day he got. And hopefully with his not-not-seven attitude he failed in his mission to surprise someone.

***

"Kanak, I am sorry."

"Don't..."

"Kanak, please..."

"Fuck off!"

***

She thought it was another sleepless night. Twists and turns, uneasiness and unshed tears.

She wasn't crying, yet wanted to. Crying wasn't for weak people, it was for those who knew how to let it out, how to let it go. Crying wasn't asking for sympathy, it was for embracing loneliness, to accept it. Crying wasn't cheap, it was priceless for it showed how hard world was, how unfair it could be.

And Kanak was nothing. She wasn't strong enough to cry, not courageous enough to accept it. And for her, her own self was worthless.

She stood abruptly, yanking off the bedsheet which her mother had covered. Her mind wandered in confusion and it ended nearby her mother's lap.

She lay there, like a new born, whimpering and hugging her mother.

Bhaskar shouldn't have been her friend. Not because he had seen through the papers of her registration.

It was because she had also seen his information, his name and birth date was only thing she was able to collect. Slight red marks inside her both palms were proof.

And still, she had slapped him. Because she felt ashamed of herself.

Kanak wasn't a thief, she could never be. Not after the deeds done by her father.