Fly High, Burn Bright

Chapter 86

The blade sunk up to the hilt with a satisfying squelch, only to be drowned out by another scream of pain that erupted from Hawks. Blood swelled from the wound, gathering into a small puddle at his chest, and I yanked the knife out to admire the mangled flesh. Hawks lowered his head to look down at where his usual uniform was torn in two, dark red staining the black fabric, his eyes wide as he reached a tentative hand to feel the wound. His gloved fingers came up slick and wet and coated in red. A shame that he wore gloves. It would've been so much better to see his bare fingers tremble.

It felt too easy. I'd given him every chance to fight back. I'd even given him the benefit of deactivating my quirk so that we could see one another, which was only fair. It was a fight without quirks, a fight on even grounds, and yet, he was too weak to even strike me once. Quite pathetic, considering he was supposed to be the second strongest hero of Japan. To think that I'd let someone this weak ruin my life was embarrassing, but the most I could do now was get my revenge. And so I did. I got my revenge for everything that he'd ever done to hurt me.

He'd led me on for over ten years. That earned him another stab through his heart, and he gasped, blood dribbling from his lips. He'd only stuck around because he pitied me. A slash cut through the base of his wings, the remaining feathers scattering in a circle around him in a grotesque halo. He made me protect him only to abandon me the second that I went 'too far'. Gashes ran through both of his arms, the blood dripping onto the cement rooftop that I shoved him into. He betrayed me and found himself someone new without even checking that I was gone forever. The blades ran over his ribcage, ignoring his weak cries of protest. He tortured me, he hurt me, he destroyed me in ways that no one else could. The blades sunk into his heart again, twisting one final time as a guttural pierced through the air for the last time.

Only after several long seconds passed in silence did I pull away from the now-still body, shuddering slightly. I was breathing heavily, doubled over Hawks, my knees on either side of his body. When had I trapped him like this? Must've been some time during that strange haze I'd been in. I tried to stand up, but my legs were shaking uncontrollably, and my vision was tinted an angry shade of red. I frowned slightly - I didn't know I could use my quirk on myself to see things differently. Ah, right. I couldn't. Some blood must've gotten in my eyes, then, or maybe that saying about seeing red was true after all. Oh, well. It wasn't like that mattered anyway. I just needed to get up and get back to the League now. The mission was over now, wasn't it? So all that was left was for me to get up and go. 

So why couldn't I? Why was I frozen in my spot, hovering over Haw- over Keigo's dead body, unable to stay but unable to go? Was it really that hard, when all I needed to do was pull the knives out and go on my merry way? Yes, yes it was. But why? I'd done the right thing, hadn't I? All I did was give him what he deserved for hurting me so bad, and that's what I'd always done anyway, right? I'd even made the battle fair. I'd taken away both our quirks so that we were on even ground, so that it wasn't biased and neither one of us held the advantage. It was his fault, really, that he died. He was the one that never bothered to get stronger without his quirk, wasn't he? He was the one that broke my heart and shattered my trust over and over again, so it was his fault that he ended up dead, wasn't it? So why couldn't I force myself to move?

Had it been like this the first time I'd killed? No, it hadn't. I'd felt the same rage, the same bloodlust and need to hurt my opponent. Hell, I'd even seen the same red cloud my vision. But I'd been able to get up and go. I'd been able to leave as if nothing happened, as if I hadn't mutilated a murderer with my own two hands, so why couldn't I do the same thing now? It wasn't any different. That villain had killed my sister, so I killed them. And now, Hawks killed someone who was like my sister, so I killed him. It was simple, wasn't it? It was fair. So why the hell did tears start flowing down my cheeks?