Our Stormy Ride

*25 °Baby Steps (1)

Nadia

She wraps her tiny fingers around my pinky, her small hands soft against my skin, with big black eyes that stare right at you. Letting out a little sound, she kicks her purple shawl away with her legs, earning a scowl from her mother.

"She always does that, ugh! Her dad thinks she might take up something sporty in the future, in sha Allah. Gave me lots of sleepless nights with those kicks", Huda says, her hands already readjusting the cloth to cover up the baby properly. She has this adoring and awed look in her eyes, like she can't believe this tiny bundle of joy is hers.

I laugh at her words, and the sound causes the baby to look my way, almost as if she's curious about it.

When Huda had called a week back to break the news, I couldn't help the relief and happiness that washed over me. I'd smiled all day like a goon, and Jahid kept on hinting it had something to do with Jamal, which brings us back to him. The days succeeding the wedding were a bit awkward at first, but then we settled into a sort of comfortable companionship around each other. Like babies taking their first step; unsure of the outcome. There are days when I recede into my shell, curled up with a book and keeping the rest of the world at bay. I feel ummi is being patient with me, and so is Jamal.

Huda snaps her fingers together in front of my face, bringing my thoughts to a halt. There's a little frown on her face as she asks, "Hmm?".

My brows dig in confusion, "Hmm what?".

Her palm connects with her face, a sigh escaping her lips. "I leave for like, a month, and you end up getting hitched. What sort of a friend are you?".

I shrug, then return to play with the baby.

"Nuh-uh! You're not giving me that attitude. I need answers", her eyes light up, "So tell me, do you like him?", she asks bluntly.

"W-what?", I sputter.

She rolls her eyes, "Don't tell me you're still 'getting used to each other' ", she makes air quotes around the words. "Speaking of which, where is your husband, and why didn't you come with him?"

"Work, but he'll come pick me up, then you can meet him. Happy now?"

"Hmm, no. You still haven't answered my question, Do. You. Like. Him? ", she repeats, punctuating every word by poking my side.

"You're way too forward about this", I reply as she picks up the baby and begins to rocks her gently.
"And yes, I'm still getting used to it. There are a lot of things we don't know yet about one another, and though he's nice and all that, it's too early to discuss anything touchy-feely. Nevertheless, not everyone can be like you and Imran".

She smiles as she looks down at the baby, "We weren't always like this. Trust me when I say he almost got frustrated with me. We had a lot of differences then and we argued over every little thing, but somehow, here we are. I always thought he loved me a little bit too early. I was still trying to find my bearings then". She sighs, and adds quietly, "Still trying to lick my wounds".

I gape at her, shocked by this new confession. "But you didn't have any reservations, I mean, you weren't forced or anything". I rack my brain to bring up the memory of her wedding, trying to remember if there was ever a sign of unhappiness on her face during those days. She always seemed so calm and accepting about it.

She shakes her head, "No, but my parents were glad to give me away then. They were scared and worried about me, and so they thought the union would be the next step to take. Somehow my dad reconnected with one of his cousins, Imran's mom, and then fate happened". She rests the sleeping baby on the bed, tucking the pink shawl around her properly before shifting her gaze to me.