Everything To Lose

Chapter 21

After dinner, Clarke was doing the dishes when Lexa came up behind her and said

"Clarke, can I talk to you for a second"

Clarke was still getting used to hearing Lexa's voice saying her name in that very Lexa way after all this time. It left her lingering on just that one word.

"Sorry.. yea..." Clarke turned around and looked Lexa straight in the eye.

"I had to ask... about Abby..."

"aha" Clarke hummed.

"What does she know... about..."

"Madi? I'm sorry I know I should have asked you first before mentioning anything about Madi to her..."

"No, that's not what I meant" Lexa said, shifting her weight uncomfortably from one foot to the other, her hands now folded across her torso.

"I mean... does she know why I left...?" Lexa said, looking visibly uncomfortable.

"Yes... I... I told her everything..." Clarke said.

Lexa nodded and then stared at the floor.

"She didn't talk to me for months" Clarke continued.

Lexa looked up then. And caught the tears in Clarke's eyes.

Clarke huffed a laugh then. "Rightly so. She was livid that I, her daughter, could make such a big mistake."

"Okay..." Lexa then slowly turned around and was about to walk away

"Lexa wait..."

Lexa stopped in her tracks but didn't turn around.

"I know you're not ready to talk about whatever happened, but I want you to know that I will wait. I will wait for however long it takes..."

"You'd be wasting your time, Clarke" Lexa interrupted and the walked away.

It was noon now. And Abby would be here any minute. Lexa couldn't stop thinking about what this reunion would feel like. When she was young and growing up with Clarke as her closest friend, Abby was like a second mother to her. Lexa would spend so much time over at their home, and Abby cared for her like her very own.

When Clarke and Lexa realized and came out about how they'd fallen in love with each other, it took Abby by surprise. But Abby was never against their relationship. Always rooting for the two of them. Besides the fact that Clarke wanted to move out of home way to early than expected, nothing about Lexa had ever disappointed Abby.

Lexa wondered now, if Abby had any hard feelings towards her, about leaving Clarke. Not being by her side when she was pregnant with their baby, not being there for Aden. But she didn't even know about Aden, she didn't even know Clarke bore a child. She had no clue. She argued in her own head while pacing the floor in the living room.

But that could be what Abby may be upset with her about, that she stayed away long enough to not even know Clarke had their baby.

Just then there was a knock on the door. Lexa froze.

The kids were upstairs. Clarke was in the kitchen. Lexa's eyes got blurry but she saw a whoosh of blonde through the haze. Clarke went to get the door.

Lexa pushed herself ahead to go closer towards the doorway.

Clarke pulled the door open and Lexa watched as Clarke greeted her mom, a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and then she went on to greet a man who had accompanied Abby here.

Then all eyes were on Lexa.

"Abby..." Lexa began to say, looking into the eyes of a woman who was as close to a mother she's ever had.