Study Buddies// BILLIE EILISH

six

She shuts the door for me and walks around to her side of the vehicle and looks over at me.

"Ready?"

"Yes."

We drive off and billie picks up the aux, "Play something." I am about to take it from her and she pulls it away. I look at her dumfounded and she chuckles and says, "It had better be good." She smirks at me and returns her eyes to the road.

I am scared, but I do have this one playlist on Spotify. It is chaotic at best, but I love it with my whole heart. I plug in the aux and shuffle the playlist. Good days by SZA comes on and Billie seems to approve. "This is my shit" she says over the long ass instrumental in the beginning. I smile and look out the window, tapping my foot to the beat. Next, Animal by Neon Trees starts to play and she keeps smiling so I guess it's good.

 I jam out to the song with Billie dancing along with me. The song ends and the next thing I hear is, "Want a break from the ads? If you tap now to watch a short video, you'll receive thirty minutes of add free music" 

My face goes red from embarrassment but Billie just lets out the fullest, most genuine laugh I have ever heard. "Sorry, I don't have Spotify premium" I say, unsure if I should watch the video or not. 

"Yes, really, if you tap now to-" 

Billie shouts through her laughs. "Watch the damn video!" I click the button right in time. Even I am laughing now. She makes me feel so... safe.

Billie is enjoying herself when right as we pull into a local cafe parking lot , Girls by Girl In Red starts to play. I move quickly to change it because I am scared she will reject me for being gay, but Billie grabs my hand before it can get to my phone.

"Don't change it on account of me, I like seeing who you really are." Butterflies. Absolute butterflies. I just let out an awkward laugh and sit back in my seat.

Billie parks and turns off the car. I reach towards the door handle.

"Wait." I stern Billie says. I do as told and Billie gets out of the car and walks to my side, opening the door for me. This bitch. She's gonna make me fall hard, I just know it.

Before I get out, I grab my phone, and a small note pad and pen. I want Billie to know this isn't a date. I wouldn't want to make her feel uncomfortable.

Billie takes my hand and we walk into the cafe. She chooses a table by a large window and we sit. I pull my notepad out of my pocket and begin, "So, Billie, what did you do this summer?" I click my pen and look up at her.

She holds in a breath and then lets it out in a hearty laugh and says, "So you're interrogating me now?"

"Well, I just don't want to forget anything." I explain.

"Put that away and just talk to me" She tilts her head and looks into my eyes.

"How will I-"

"Are you seriously questioning me?" She laughs in disbelief, "You do what I say, when I say, remember? I don't want your pretty little self to get in trouble," She smiles sweetly, "but you have to stay in line and understand that I am the boss. Now, put it away."

I do as I am told and swiftly shove the stack of bound papers into my pocket before I get beat. "So, Cameron, what did you do this summer?" She asks as the waiter brings over two waters.

Why is she so interested in me? We are supposed to be working on her  project. This whole thing was so I could get to know her.

"Uh-um, I mainly just hung out with my family" I say, looking down at my hands.

"What's your family like?" she asks.

"Oh, well they are nice" I keep staring at my hands.

"Really?" 

I just look up at her awkwardly. What am I supposed to say?

"Give me something juicy! Have you come out to your parents?" She smirks at me.

Fuck. She's gonna out me to the whole school isn't she? She's gonna call me disgusting and the kids are gonna yell slurs at me in the halls. I am gonna get beat up every day and come home with bruises and a worried sister. I'm gonna-

"Hey, don't worry! I won't tell!" My thoughts are interrupted by an angel voice. I slowly removed my hands from pulling at my hair. I guess I really spiraled there. My breathing is still insanely fast.

Billie gets up from her side of the booth and quickly moves over to mine. This makes me even more nervous and I start ticking like crazy. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Is she gonna hurt me again?

She sits down right next to me and holds both my hands in one of hers and pulls me into a hug with the other. I just sit there, my head on her chest, listening to her slow heart beat, calming me down.

"Shh, shhh, don't worry, Cameron. Breathe with me" She rubbed my back and we took a few deep breaths together. Once I was finally calmed down, her soft face turned intimidating again and she released me from her embrace, smiling deviously.

"What?" I ask nervously.

"So, you are gay?" She asks.

"Yes" I respond, "Now can we please-"

"Does anyone know?" she smirks and looks me up and down, making me incredibly uncomfy.

"Just my younger sister" 

"Ooohh so I have dirt on you?" She nudged my side with her elbow, "I'm gonna hold that over you"

"Or you don't, and it's one less thing for me to worry about" I said with a chuckle.

"Mmmmm... Okay. I can make you do what I want anyway."

I would argue with her but she's right so...

She gets up from her seat next to me, "Okay well I have to go because, you know, I have a life. Come, or you won't have a ride home."

"We never talked about you though." I said, hoping she'd stay because I should really be starting this essay, "An all we have had is water!"

"Not my problem," she began to walk away so I quickly got up and followed, not wanting to have to walk home.

She opens the car door for me like always and makes her way to the driver's seat, "Okay, mamas, what's your address?"