my eyes slowly blinked open, gus was awake and sitting on his phone next to me waiting for me to get up as well. "i'm sorry about last night. i honestly have no clue why that came over me, that was pretty uncalled for" i apologized to gus for my strange, asleep-nightmare outburst. "it's okay hun, it's not your fault. just a nightmare" he said.
"you know i'd never ever ever do that to you right? i know i wasn't shit to start but i love you more than anything else on the planet and i need you and i can't live without you, i'd never do anything to jeopardize us asp. never ever. i also wouldn't do that to tracy, he's my best friend too. it would have been wrong on so many levels" gus said, taking my hands. you could the emotion and truth in his eyes, he really meant it. he also seemed genuinely concerned i would leave him over a nightmare.
"i know gus, i love you and i trust you. it was just a nightmare. it just got me worked up. i don't think i could handle losing you again. it hurts me just as much as you" i told him. "i was scared you were going to leave me for a minute, you just woke up out of a dead sleep screaming that you hate me" he said.
"i'm sorry, i don't hate you. i honestly don't know what that was. i'm okay now though" i said. "it's okay angel, stop apologizing" gus said. how'd i get so lucky to have someone who so willingly puts up with all my crazy? "where'd you even dream up that idea?" gus asked. i shrugged "we both know i'm just crazy" i said, "i wanted to hate her at first because i thought she was gonna try and take you" i told him.
"babe, i was gonna wait to do this but i feel like now is a good moment" gus said. "do what?" i asked. gus got out of bed, and went to his old room. i could hear him rummaging around through the wall, he must have been looking for something. what the hell was he doing? gus came back into the room, he held a silver ring with little pink crystals around it out in his hand.
"it's beautiful but what's it for babe?" i asked. gus placed the ring on my finger. "i'm not proposing, yet, one day" he said, "but it's just like a place holder until then. i promise i'm gonna marry you and i promise i'm yours and you are mine and i promise that i'll stay with you forever and that i'll be everything you need me to be" gus said.
"aw, i love you. it's perfect" i said, "i was gonna wait for a little while but your little nightmare kind of inspired me to do it now, just incase it gave you any doubts about me" gus said. "you're the best boyfriend i could ask for, you're perfect" i told him. "i just don't want to lose you, ever" he said. "you're not going to" i said.
"babe why are you crying?" gus asked me. i brought my hand up to my eye, "oh fuck, i am. didn't even realize. they're happy tears though, just cause i love you" i said. "you're okay though? you don't think it's too soon or a bad time or anything?" gus asked. "it's fine, it's a good time actually it was a good coincidence to do it with. i love the idea too, everything is always perfect with you" i said.
i looked up at gus, there was so many things left to do together that we hadn't done yet. there was also so many things we had done and been through together and so many good times and good memories. we had nothing but time to keep living and doing things together.
gus and i stayed upstairs alone together for pretty much the whole day, it was kind of our moment, but if a moment lasted all day. the thing i was most grateful for was letting myself give gus a second chance, and gus himself of course. i couldn't imagine a life without him now if i would have just told him to fuck off.
we both knew now that we'd never be alone again, no matter what came our way we'd have each other through it all.
a/n
last real chapter :,) lil epilogue next
