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"well you see, hongjoong and i, well.. he's kinda my ex."

seonghwa breathed out and all of the three male's jaws dropped at that, except one's. they stayed silent for a while just staring at the platinum blonde haired boy.

"wwhat-"

"what?"

"wHat???"

"it actually makes sense." jongho got everyone's, and i mean everyone's eyes on him after that. "what? they don't get along which usually means they have some kind of history together."

"so you're actually telling me that you-" yunho pointed at seonghwa "you. pulled. kim. hongjoong????"

seonghwa sighed. "yes yunho, that's exactly what i'm saying. i told you about the-"

"but just happened to leave the name out of it??? oh my god, how did you idiot manage to fuck that up?? that boy's like a model, a literal angel, and you blew it??" yunho raised his voice a bit too much.

"yunho-" mingi tried to make him quiet.

"just so you know, i didn't fuck up anything! it was a misunderstanding which i never got the chance to explain to him! you know nothing so stop making me feel the same guilt about it again!" now seonghwa was yelling, because talking about it itself made his heart ache, he didn't want to feel the guilt too.

suddenly san realized. "so hongjoong was the summer romance you had last year.. and you haven't even looked at anyone else since that."

hearing those words, seonghwa wanted nothing more than to let the tingly drops fall out his eyes he didn't realize he was holding. san instantly noticed that and kneeled in front of him, carressing his knee comfortly.

"i-i actually knew." mingi confessed, a bit scared of the elders reaction.

seonghwa looked at mingi with wide eyes, first tear rolling down. "h-he told you? that it was me?"

"yes.. i'm sorry, i never wanted to bring it up because it's none of my business. and there had to be a reason you never opened up about it before so i didn't want you to feel forced to speak about it." mingi spoke and took his hand.

"thank you mingi, for respecting that." seonghwa smiled a little.

"seonghwa dear, do you love him?" san asked very carefully, looking straight at the other males shining eyes.

seonghwa's eyes widened again. "what- no! why would i-"

"hwa.. you don't have to admit or accept it, but based on your reaction it would make sense." jongho spoke calmly.

the eldest sighed, feeling more of the wet drops fall out his eyes, not really knowing what to say. "fuck, i-i don't know. this exactly why i didn't wanna talk about it before.."

"it's okay, we're here. you're okay." san wiped his tears away.

seonghwa sighed, fearing that the youngest's words were true. "how could i love someone i don't even know anymore?"

"it is possible if the feelings were strong enough." san said wanting seonghwa to know it's okay.

"i guarantee you, he hasn't changed a bit so technically you still know him." mingi spoke in a bit joking tone.

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