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HIS NIQABI GIRL

Elham.

"Good morning" Rahma said to me as I strutted down the hallway with my hand bag in one hand.

"Rahma, good morning. Please come with me, we have a lot of work to sort out" I answered with a firm smile.

I had barely had enough sleep the previous night. As a matter of fact, I had been a mess since the incident with Lakshmi and Farhanna on Saturday and I didn't like how much of an impact it had on me afterwards.
After the incident, I stormed out of the apartment and drove aimlessly around New York for over five hours.
Yes, I was that hurt.
Consequently, I realized that it wasn't just about what had happened with Farhanna and Lakshmi. It was also about what Sufy had said. And most importantly, Asaad.

What Asaad had said had taken a toll on my my mental well-being more than I expected and now, I found myself gradually feeling numb to the things around me.
If I was being honest, it had been a while since I had felt this way. The last time I had felt this numb was when Ummi was battling cancer. And now, my emotions brought back those memories.

"Are you feeling alright? You don't seem too well?" Rahma asked me.

"I'm good. Pass me those papers please" I responded firmly, pointing to a small pile of papers.

As she passed me the papers, my thoughts wandered back to Saturday. While I was busy driving around NYC, my phone buzzed a million times. Apparently, everyone was suddenly worried . But I didn't give a care. They weren't worried when I kept on taking the garbage they dumped at me , did they?
Or was I being too dramatic and sensitive?

Once I had cooled off, I went through the numerous calls and texts from my friends.
I dialled Sufy's phone number.

"Hey, Elham where have you been? Why haven't you been picking up? We've been worried sick?" That was the first thing he had said to me.

I spoke to him calmly, ignoring all his questions and letting him know that I was fine and I was heading back home. I did the same with Imaan and Yas.

I met a concerned looking Asaad once I was back home. The others had left and despite his multiple questions, I only told him that I was fine and he had nothing to worry about.

I slept in the guest room that night, and the next night as well.
I spent the whole of Sunday at Imaan's place and although I was tempted to open up to her about what had actually happened that day, I knew I wasn't ready to talk about it, so I didn't.

"There's a general meeting in an hour" Rahma informed me, making me realise that I had zoned out.

"Alright" I said, before we began to sort out the papers.

I was aware that Rahma knew I was lying and that something actually bothered me but I wasn't going to admit it to her, was I? Besides, there was no point in opening up to her. She was my secretary and had no business knowing about my personal life. Asides that, there was nothing she could do to help even if I told her.

There was nothing anyone could do to help. I was already pushed to the wall and no salvaging could take place.
I was sick and tired of Asaad and his lover and I was done taking their garbage.

When I had gotten back home on Sunday, I was met with a very intoxicated Asaad. Again, I simply ignored him and locked myself up throughout the night.
However I wasn't sad. As a matter of, Something about us living that way made me feel at peace. No complications, no expectations and no hurt.

It was perfect.

Except I was still hurt, I couldn't stop replaying the events, his words, their words.

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