Class Of 96': 1994 (BxB Mystery)

Chapter LVIII - The Mother

The days after that were all the same.

"So did you do it?" Tyler would ask me in the school halls.

"Tell us the truth." Officer Vegas would demand in the police station.

You're the Hazard, aren't you?

I knew you were suspicious.

Why did you attack my friend?

What drove you?

Why?

Why?

Why?

Hands covering my face, I finally broke.

"What's on your mind, Steph?"

Officer Vegas and I were in the interrogation room again. Cold and unsettling. Even if you're on the good side. I am not.

How pathetic is it to silently sob in front of an officer?

I felt my warm tears spread around my face. It's been a while since Ollie's attack. And I haven't seen him once. Molly cut ties with me after her outburst. She stopped going to school. The day of her outburst was the last time I saw her.

I see Innes often. She doesn't look at me. Let alone talk to me. It bugs me to know her investigation board, made by our friend group, now has all our faces on it. And I'm probably at its center.

And everyone back at the academy . . . they all think I'm the Hazard. This whole month has been filled with people asking me why I attacked my best friend.

Well, I'll tell you right now.

I did not attack my boyfriend.

I did not attack Jane. I did not attack The Brunette Boy. I did not attack Luka.

"Look at me."

I slowly did as Officer Vegas said.

"You don't even have a lawyer. Come clean and the charges against you won't be as heavy. We've been going back and forth for a month."

"A-Are there any evidence against me?" I managed to say, voice quivering.

Vegas didn't falter. "Your fingerprints on Ollie's body, tally timelines, unconfirmed timelines, the recorder, your bracelet in Jane Doe's dorm, CCTV footage displaying your involvement in The Brunette Boy attack, and multiple testimonies regarding your presence at the crime scene of Luka Alexeev's attack."

Still teary, I closed my eyes. So much was against me. So much . . .

"Steph," Vegas tilted his head. "How old are you again?"

I remained silent.

"Sixteen." He knew my age. He knew everything on my name. He rubbed his forehead. "Christ, you're not even a legal adult. How did you get into so much trouble?"

***

It was dinner. I was sitting with a plate of adobo in front of me and so was my ma.

I'm not hungry.

I held my head down and spoon-toyed with the rice back and forth.

I'm not hungry.

My stomach growled. I didn't want to eat. Just the thought of lifting the spoon to my mouth made me want to vomit.

My eyes were hurting, stinging, and getting glossy.

I'm not hungry.

' . . . ' My mom looked at me with concern in her eyes. She sighed, enough of me.

'Oh, what's the problem?' She asked in Tagalog.

I didn't answer. I didn't even look at her. I just kept staring at my food because I know for a fact, if I looked at her, I'd cry.

'Eat.'

Silence.

She pursed her lips in defeat as she shifted her short body facing mine. 'I know it's been hard for you. But your going to let them bring you down? You're better than that.'

I couldn't answer. My throat was being choked.

' . . . Stephan, eat already.'

"I'm not hungry." I whispered, my hands going weak.

'No, you eat.'

" . . . "

She sighed again. She could feel my grief. She's my mother. She's my mother and she carried a convict in her womb. She carried me.

'Are you sad that those good-for-nothing people think you're a criminal? I gave birth to a fragile boy. You can't even talk back to me.'

I opened my mouth, but nothing followed.

Finally, I spoke through the tears I didn't realize were there.

"I was never sad about people thinking I was the Hazard. I just thought . . . they knew better." My tears began to fall faster, my voice breaking with it. "I was sad . . . I was sad that I lost someone I loved. And I'm never allowed to see him again."

'You loved him?'

"Yes . . . and I still do."

She gently pulled me into a warm embrace. A warm embrace to mask the cold reality lurking outside our door.

I let myself sink, sobbing into her shoulder, head buried.

I hugged her back. My grasp turned harder as my cries turned into muffled wails.

Little did I know that very moment was all I needed.

A mother's embrace.