mind, body, and soul | lee felix

thirty four

Emily stands over Felix's body, knife in her right hand as she raises her eyebrows at him.

"Well," she says, stretching out the syllables. "I'm not cleaning him up."

Bitch, I want to say. I want to curse her out and kill her and make her understand exactly what she's done.

Emily made me fall in love with her so it would be harder to find the one person who I was actually supposed to be with. She lied to me, played me, and then killed the person I loved too late. I would tell her to burn in hell, but as it turns out, she's already doing that.

"I hope you never find happiness." I mutter, loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. Emily just scoffs and makes eye contact with Christopher, who is still keeping me from going to Felix.

"That's not the kindest way to talk to someone, is it?" Emily says, frowning at me. "Especially someone who is about to take you home. What if we didn't?"

I curse at her, done with playing her games. I just want to see Felix. I could care less about trying to one up her anymore.

"We won't do that, though." Christopher says quietly. Emily glares at him, but I feel him shake his head. Letting go of me, Christopher walks around to face me. I can't read him at all; I have utterly no idea what he's thinking.

"We won't keep you here. I made a promise. I'm taking you and Jisung back." I glare at Jisung, who hasn't moved from his spot. He hasn't even taken his eyes off of Felix.

"You can keep him. I don't want him." I tear my gaze from Jisung to look at Christopher. He just shakes his head, grabbing my arm and walking us over to Jisung, taking his arm as well.

"Not an option." Christopher tells us both to close our eyes and we do so, me unwillingly. When I open my eyes again, after what seems like a second, Christopher is gone. It's just Jisung and I, standing in the front lawn of the house Felix and I bought before I died.

Jisung looks at me, his hands in his pockets. My head spins with everything I want to say to him, but I settle on the one thing that I know will hurt him most.

"I hope you never find love. Ever." Lifting my chin, I turn away from him when I hear his quiet answer.

"I don't deserve it." Looking over my shoulder at Jisung, I see him drop his head. His shoulders are pulled up higher and I swear I see a tear fall. A part of me wants to go and comfort him; I hate that part of me.

I shake my head and turn my back on him. For good. He's right; he doesn't deserve it. 

-

(just to clarify, i DO NOT THINK any of this is true!!! to be clear, jisung is my ult bias in kpop and i will defend him to the ends of the earth. he deserves all the love and recognition he can get irl. i can SMELL yall in the comments already, but for the sake of the story, this is what happens.)