The Blade in Gravity Falls

CHAPTER 12: GXPE MRNH DERXW EHLQJ ZHW

Found that image on the wiki, terrifying.

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AN: I wonder what the title could be, it's a first for me to use a code, but I have faith in you!

According to Dr. Medicine, joining the discord can extend your life span by nine morbillion years!

https://discord.gg/eSSP2GtYQS

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Dipper Pines carried the pair of books his Grunkle Stan had handed him while Stan was in the bottomless pit. Dipper hadn't had a chance to look inside the books yet, but he would before he went to sleep. His sister Mabel was sitting on her bed in the room they shared as he walked in.

"So, Bro-bro, what're the books about? Are there princesses? Fairies? Fairy princesses?"

"I don't know yet, Mabel, I'm about to open them for the first time." Dipper said as he crawled onto his bed. Before he could crack the first volume open, Mabel jumped up beside him, reading over his shoulder.

This is the true story of one my friends, an example of a brilliant tactician in a stupid war.

"That's promising!" Mabel said excitedly, while Dipper just flipped the page.

The war started because of literature, so remember kids, books are bad for you.

"Man, whoever wrote this book sure knows what he's talking about." Mabel said, nodding in agreement. Dipper just sighed at his sister's antics.

Technoblade, Famous in many circles for being a great warrior and earning the title of Blood God, needed some books made out of baked potatoes to enhance his armor. Applying earlier lessons [see volumes 1,3,4, and 7 for more information], Techno solved it using the best method available.

""Wait, Technoblade!?"" The Pines Twins asked in unison. They resumed reading at a fevered pitch.

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Roughly thirty minutes later, they had finished the two volumes.

"we gotta talk to Techno about this, I had no idea he fought in a war and quoted Sun Tsu!" Dipper exclaimed, pacing back and forth while clicking a clicky pen. (You know, those pens that you click down on the top to write with, then click again to stop writing.)

"Sun who? I'm more interested in that Squidkid, from the illustrations he seemed pretty hot."

"Mabel, didn't mom say to stop falling in love with drawings when you fell in love with the man on the $10 bill?"

"Pish posh, brother, she probably wasn't serious about that! Besides, mom's not here right now, Stan is! I'm sure Stan wouldn't have a problem with it!"

"Yeah but Stan isn't exactly the most responsible of guardians."

"Dipper, do you really think I would mess with your mysteries just for a hottie?"

"Frankly? Yes."

Before the argument could escalate any further, Stan's voice echoed throughout the house, "Hey, cut the chit-chat! Some of us are trying to sleep, ya little shysters."

""Sorry Grunkle Stan!"" Both Pines Twins shouted back.

"Sheesh, can't a man have peace and quiet in his own house?" Stan grumbled to himself while taking off his clothes.

Back in the twin's room, Dipper and Mabel lay down on their beds.

"Alright, Tomorrow we go find Techno and talk to him about this." Dipper said.