Where We Go | Book Three

59. Live Slowly

Everyone had left early at dinner the following evening, leaving Ben and me alone in the restaurant. It felt nice, almost normal to be able to live slowly. I'd like to imagine a life where that would've been our weekends. Across the table, his hair was tousled, and he blinked slowly, still tired from the previous days. He was effortlessly attractive, even first thing in the morning, and it wasn't fair.

"Out of everything, she remembered her name and Julia's..." I spoke. "It was hard enough for me just to remember my name."

"What does that mean?" Ben asked with curiosity, leaning forward on his elbows. "Is she different?"

I exhaled, looking out the window to the rest of the compound. It was beautiful that evening in the low light. The setting sun was calming and reminded me of countryside holidays people would take. In the past, Land's End would've been the escape I wished for, the break I might've needed. 

I exhaled. "It means she hardly thought about anything else while she was Infected... She was committed to remembering."

"Wow." Ben scoffed quietly. "You know, I still can't believe it. I woke up this morning thinking it was going to be another day like before and then it took a moment for it to all sink in. Things have finally changed."

"I can't believe it either," I said. "I keep thinking we have something to worry about, and then there's nothing." I smiled, watching him as he looked out the window. "Your mum would be proud of you if she saw you today," I added softly, squeezing his hand across the table.

He turned. "She probably wouldn't recognise me," he chuckled. "I barely recognise myself... But in a good way. I'm glad I've changed. I feel better for it."

"Me too," I smiled.

"If only you'd told me this is where I'd be sitting when I ran through your apartment building that day. I would've thought I'd lost my mind."

I smirked. "Or when you shot at me."

"Near you," he corrected. "Not at you."

"I still don't believe you," I laughed. "But what a fucking journey, huh?"

His stare glistened. "The best one I could've asked for."

My heart leapt and my stomach twisted in knots. He would never understand the effect he had on me, and I didn't want him to. I stood up from the table, holding out my hand to him.

"Come on," I said, remaining still. "I want to take you somewhere."

"Where?" he scowled with a laugh.

I cocked my head. "You don't want to spoil the surprise, do you?"

*

I moved to stand in front of him and pressed my palm against his cheek. Lifting my head, I pressed my lips against his. It was brief, delicate and gentle and, by his slight jump, he hadn't expected it. As I pulled away, his brows pressed together, his eyes still closed as he tried to hide a smile.

"Now you can open them," I whispered, standing at his side.

His lids flickered open and his pupils dilated. The smile at his lips turned to a grin and a laugh found its way from his throat. His eyes danced, never holding on to one spot for more than a second before finding something new to look at. 

At my side, his calloused fingers wrapped themselves around mine once again, holding like he might never let go.

The sunset was glowing a brilliant orange in the sky, burning brighter than I'd ever seen. Colours twisted above us, blending the clouds away with a wind-like brush stroke. At our feet, flowers towered to our knees, tickling our skin. They swayed in all their vast colours, deep pinks, subtle oranges and bright whites standing out from the horizon. Each one with a detail so intricate that no artist could ever do them the beautiful justice they deserved.

"Wow," Ben exhaled. His beaming smile only grew, and his caramel eyes sparkled in the orange light. "I've never seen Land's End like this before."

"That's because we're always looking the wrong way... Or being shot at."

"It's beautiful," he said, awestruck at the view.

He laughed and wrapped his arms around my waist, resting his head on my shoulder as we both looked out to the horizon. I wanted to stay in that moment forever, in eternal bliss, wrapped in Ben's arms. I could've lived a thousand lifetimes and never would've been as content as I was at that moment.

"Did you bring me here to distract me?" he whispered. "We still have work to do."

"No," I half shrugged. "But is it working?"

With a sigh and a kiss against my cheek, he loosened his grip around me. "Come on," he smiled. "Or we'll be late."

*

Ben held my hand at the table, squeezing it gently.

"What do you think?" he smiled. "Do you want to take this one?"

The sun was at its lowest point on the horizon, spreading swirling, deep orange hues across the sky. The colours were taken straight from a painting. They were deep and rich, painted with thick brushstrokes. Across the sunset canvas, I took the radio from him, hovering my finger over the button. There was something about this moment I'd been waiting for.

"This is Em Harrison and Ben Robertson. We are broadcasting from Land's End to find anyone who is still alive... We have the cure."

This is what it was to finally live. It was that pure life I breathed now. Surrounding me, embracing me, inhaling me. And if this was the beauty that life holds for me, I can only imagine what awaits at the end.