Sarcasm-Five Hargreeves x Reader (The Umbrella Academy)

Chapter 36

The quartet huddled behind the stone wall, peaking at the many people coming out of their cars and going into the red brick building.

Y/N looked around to make sure the coast was clear before climbing over the wall, Five, Diego, and Lila following right after her.

They huddled behind the sides of the cars and crouched down behind a blue one that had a perfect view of the door.

Y/N sat sideway so her feet were poking out of her dress, her well used sneakers showing themselves. Five scoffed at the girl in amusement as he sat behind her.

"So what's the plan," Lila asked.

"We infiltrate, we identify, we extract. Double time," Diego said in a hushed voice.

"What the hell's he talking about," Lila asked Five and Y/N.

"Find the old man and get out fast," Five shrugged.

"That's what I said."

"Yeah, but you used your brain this time," Y/N sighed. "You don't do that often."

Diego rolled his eyes and looked back at Lila, Y/N, and Five. "On me."

He ran forward, Y/N doing the same but Lila and Five stayed.

"After you," Lila said.

Five glared at her harshly as she said, "what, I can't be polite?"

"Cut the crap. All right? My dimwitted brother might buy your bullshit, but I don't trust you for a second," Five hissed.

"Really? I think Y/N's growing on me."

"It's the other way around, and she's having trust issues after you forced her into a dress," Five snapped.

"O ye of little faith," Lila said in a high pitched voice as Five gave a fake smile.

"Stick it up your ass."

Lila chuckled and followed after Y/N, Five eyeing her every move.

~~~

Loud music played through the crowded room as Five stole a cup of wine from a tray, making the waitress give him weird looks.

"I don't see dad anywhere," Diego said.

"Just look for his little Boy Scout group," Y/N rolled her eyes. "Whatever they're planning, he's apart of it."

"Yeah. Me and Y/N got the upstairs. Keep an eye out," Five said as he out a hand on     Y/N's back and they walked up.

"Oh, and, Diego," Y/N called.

The man turned with a puzzled look as she smiled. "Don't do anything stupid."

Lila chuckled softly and Five threw her a jock glare before Y/N and Five descended down the halls, looking for the stairs. Once they found them, they ran up, ignoring the strange glances sent to them from other guests.

From below the spiral staircase, Y/N and Five could make out the figures of Lila and Diego dancing merrily, laughing, twirling, and forgetting about their very important job, that could be a huge factor in the end of the world.

"At least they're fitting in," Five sighed.

~~~

Five and Y/N heard hushed voices from the next hall, so quietly, they peaked over the wall and saw 11 men in black suits speaking urgently to each other as they all filed into a room. It was the Majestic Twelve, however, one person seemed to be missing.

Giving each other a nervous glance, the duo got out of their hiding spot and eyed the room hesitantly until Five spatial jumped them as close as they could get to the room, hidden.

Y/N shifted towards the left to get a good view of the meeting which was a little bit difficult seeing as they were looking at them from the slim holes in the closet door they were in.

"The president is continuing to make inquires into Roswell and other crash sites, gentlemen," a man said. "And as you know, we cannot allow him to get his nose into our business. I've confirmed the motorcade will indeed be turning left on Elm Street. We'll have our people in place."

Y/N narrowed her eyes at a familiar monocle that was being polished and placed back onto a man whose back was facing the closet.

"Gentleman, this plan of yours seems ill-timed," Reginald Hargreeves replied.

"It's gonna be a turkey shoot," another said,

Five's eyed widened as he caught sight of the man he had disobeyed 45 years ago, leading to his troubled life in the past apocalypse. After seeing him again after all those years, he couldn't help but once again have guilt of not listening to him back in the days, no matter how nastily he acted towards his kids.

In all Five's astonishing and self reliving, he had forgotten about his surroundings and current circumstance as he stepped back and accidentally stepped on a pile of hangers on the ground. And unfortunately, the noise that came from the hangers was loud enough to alert the whole council as all eyes turned to the closet.

"Shh," Reginald hushed his fellow associates and took his cane that was hanging over the fire and walked over to the closet.

Grabbing onto Five's elbow, Y/N stepped back into the coats, trying to get as far away from the door as she could as Reginald lifted his cane and jabbed it into the door.

Five quickly spacial jumped the both of them into the hall, just as the tip of the cane brushed against his hand, and exhaled deeply once they looked around their new surroundings. However, this relief didn't last long as Five felt Y/N's hand meet his cheek and leave a stinging pain when it left.

"We were just about to hear their plan, dimwit! How many times have I told you to be careful of your surroundings," Y/N hissed.

"I'm so sorry I don't have eyes on the back of my head," Five said sarcastically.

"You better wish you do by the time I'm done with you!"

"Oh really," Five asked, venom laced in his tone.

"Yeah!"

"Okay!"

"Great!"

"Awesome!"

"Fine."

"Fine."

They both rolled their eyes and Y/N turned on her heel but stopped instantly once she saw a familiar bob of white hair.

"Shoot," Y/N and a Five said in unison.

The man brought his hands up, trying to capture the two but Five spatial jumped just in time, leaving Y/N. The man pushed her into the wall as she ducked to avoid the man's punch and she sent a fireball to the man, who dodged it.

The man gave a nasty smile at the look on Y/N face but that was wiped off his face as Five jumped onto his back and tried to choke the Swede.

The man cough and sputtered with his red face and he grabbed Five off of his back. Five grunted in surprise when he saw Y/N take off her shoe and jab it into the Swede's neck, before sweeping his feet and running over to Five.

"Did the Handler send you," he yelled, as Y/N quickly helped him off the floor, completely forgetting about their previous argument.

The man gave no response as he elbowed Five and started to punch him hardly. But Five pulled his foot and tried to roll away, but the man kicked him and he slammed into the window, catching a terrible sight.

Reginald and the rest of the Majestic Twelve were all calling taxis and leaving the event and there was barely any time left to speak with Reginald.

Y/N noticed this and she quickly blocked the Swede's sight of Five, signaling him to go and get him.

"Hurry Five, get downstairs and talk with Dad, I got this covered."

Five met Y/N's eyes and gave a quick nod before he spatial jumped away from the scene, leaving the Swede and Y/N to themselves.

But right before Y/N could do anything, the man fainted, the blood from the wound Y/N made with her shoe clouding up in his clothes leaving Y/N there with a satisfied face.

"Well, that's one job less I get to do."

~~~