What happens in Vegas

29| Reality

Chapter 29: Reality (Bella's POV)

I sat there, very confused. I kind of knew what this was about but it wasn't making any sense to me yet. We've still got this summer to spend, why is he so desperate to know about whether I'm really going to college or not? And more importantly, why isn't he just asking me? 

I hopped off the counter and let my hair down before heading over to the couch in the living room and sitting down. 

Should I eavesdrop? 

No, I should not. 

But that doesn't mean I won't. 

I stood up and headed over to the backyard, stopping at the entrance. I stood against the wall, leaning my head back, wincing at what I was doing. I shook my head clear of thoughts and headed back. I am not going to eavesdrop. 

Oh, but you want to. 

Yes, but I won't. I groaned, running upstairs and to my room, closing the door behind me. I need to find something to do, something to keep my mind off whatever is going on downstairs. I huffed, walking over to my bookshelves, thinking I'd grab a book. I skimmed through, deciding to grab my copy of Turtles All The Way Down but when I pulled it out of its place, an envelope fell out with it. 

I stared down at it, my heart rate picking up. 

Is it the letter? 

I put the book back and picked up the letter, looking at the front. 

For the tough times... 

I pulled the envelope open and pulled out the letter that I had read numerous times over the past two-three years. It's not like the whole letter was surrounding my relationship, I had other stuff going on as well, but every time I would read this stupid letter, I would be reminded of what a shitty boyfriend, shitty relationship, and shitty two years I had with him. 

I didn't want to read it, not again. In fact, this time, I wanted to burn it. 

I groaned, crumpling it up and tossing it in the trash can, missing it completely. I went into the bathroom where I brushed and then threw my hair up in a high ponytail. By the time I walked out, Noah was standing there, leaning against the closed door, staring at the crumpled ball of paper and the empty envelope sitting on my desk. I dashed over to the paper on the floor and threw it in the trash, turning to him. 

Real smooth, Bella.

"Why are you throwing that?" he asked, walking over slowly. 

"I don't want to read it again and again," I mumbled, throwing the envelope with it. 

"You don't have to keep reading it though, right? I mean, it's just a reminder of how strong you were, you-" 

"It's just a reminder of what I went through," I cut him off. 

"And how strong you were. I don't think you should throw it away, but it's up to you, okay?" I nodded in response, leaning against the desk, sighing. "Bella?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Are you even going to Berkeley?" he asked, catching me off guard. I looked up at him slightly shell shocked. 

"I- I don't know, I told you that," I stuttered. 

"Yeah, but you didn't tell me that you really don't want to go at all. You just said you weren't sure," he replied. 

"I'm not," I shrugged. 

"So, you might still be going?" 

"I don't- I have to think about it," I huffed.