What happens in Vegas

32| Coward

Chapter 32: Coward (Noah's POV)

I asked her to stay tonight and she did. Without hesitation, without any doubt, without any contemplation. We were currently lying in bed in silence, sort of just staring at each other. 

She raised her eyebrows at me, pulling her hand out of my hair. "What are you thinking about?" she whispered, scooting closer to me. 

"You," I answered. 

I was thinking about her, and how great she is, and how she deserves to be loved, and how I'm a coward because I can't admit it to her or myself that I do. I love her. I just don't have it in me to admit it, to say it out loud, to tell her. And another thing I don't have is time. The clock is ticking, summer is one day closer to its end every day. If she decides not to go, then... 

"What about me?" she grinned, her thumb brushing across my cheek. 

"About how amazing you are," I mumbled, putting my arms around her. 

"Why do you think I'm amazing?" she chuckled. 

"Because when my dad asked you what you wanted to be, you said you wanted to be happy. That's the perfect answer, one that is absolutely right too, yet for some reason, people don't think of it," I explained. Her answer told me everything I needed to know about her. It made me fall even more in love with her, and even more terrified to admit it because... 

What if I can't make her happy? 

My god, am I a coward. 

"I think about you all the time," I mumbled. 

"I think about you all the time too," she smiled sweetly and it warmed me inside out. "I think about loving you, Noah," she mumbled. 

"You're probably growing impatient," I groaned, covering my face. 

"No," she said, pulling my hands away, "Not impatient. It's just reminding me how much it means when someone says those words to you. I don't think we're grateful enough for the people who love us. And when the one person we want to doesn't, it just..." she trailed off. 

"Hurts?" I asked knowingly. 

She nodded slowly, "It hurts. But if they will love you, if they do at the end, isn't it worth it?" 

I hesitated, "And if they don't?" 

"Then that was a waste of your time but you live and you learn. You'll find the right person eventually," she shrugged. 

"What do you think?" I whispered. 

"I think I already found mine," she grinned, kissing me softly, gently, tenderly. It sent a flurry of butterflies into my stomach and I've never felt butterflies for a girl before her. 

Coward. 

She. She is everything. Everything I've ever wanted but not known where to look for it. Now that I have it, I don't know how to act, what to do, what to say, and I'm horrified at the thought of messing this up. I just pray I don't. 

"Bella," I mumbled. 

"Hmm?" she asked. 

"I really want you. More each day," I said. 

"I'm all yours when you gain the courage to admit it, Noah," she whispered. 

"Admit what?" I asked, swallowing. 

"That you like me a little more than you want to. A little more than you can say," she smirked. She's not saying it. She's not using the word 'love' because she knows. She knows I'm a coward.