Desire

Page 26

26

I called Keith's phone. No answer and he replied with an automated text

"In a meeting, call you later."

I slammed my phone down and was completely devastated. I couldn't let my emotions get the best of me. I had a very important meeting.

I called my mom, she could always help me through these things.

"Hey Ma."

"Hey my baby"

"How are you?"

"I'm alright. How you?" In her southern accent.

I explained that I was breaking down and told her that I had recently found out that Keith was cheating on me.

She said

"Listen here baby, I love you and I'm gon' always tell you the truth. I don't give a damn what a man can do for you, it doesn't equal up to what you can do for yourself, you hear me? Everybody CAN change, but it gotta be for SELF! People have to want to change. You can't love someone into treating you right. The last thing you want to do is pour all of yourself into someone just to find out it was being misplaced on them, then you're left feeling empty 'cause you ain't got nothing left. That's why you gotta take care of Deysire cause at the end of the day, if Keith leave today or tomorrow, you're all you'll have. Don't run yourself crazy, trying to stay in a marriage that is breaking you. I 'member you and him sneakin' round here, y'all done grew up together but maybe y'all done outgrew one another. You gotta know when the course has been ran, baby. You understand me?"

"Yes ma'am." I replied with tears rolling down my face.

"Everythang gon' work out for you, baby. Just trust GOD, all you got to have is faith the side of a mustard seed. Don't get discouraged, pretty girl. This too shall pass."

"I love you, Ma"

"And I love you, my baby. You gone on and cheer up. Have a good day."

"Talk to you later, Ma."

"Bye, bye baby"

I hung up the phone with my mom, feeling so much better. I dried my eyes and started to work. I kept thinking about Roberta, and it was pure guilt.

I just couldn't shake feeling like maybe she knew.

My office seemed a bit cold and almost scary. I felt like now that she was gone, she could see everything. I was uneasy.

My office phone buzzed

"Mrs. Washington, your 11 o'clock is here. It was only 10:30, but to hell with it.

"Send her in Courtney."

"Finally" I sighed in relief. I was just happy to not be alone.