Lust of Misanthropy

Proxy

Watching the rest of the club members in which I had said hardly a thing to in the past week didn't even shake me, I felt banal about the entire thing. It became quite clear that they've become so jejune because of how abstained I've been over the days.

Yuri's obsessive behaviour had progressively gotten more and more volatile to handle. I wonder if this is the price that I payed to care about her, or even simply having a stupid crush on her, just because I thought she was cute.

That poem.

It still circulated through my mind.

Everybody seemed to be packing up for the day. Sayori was without a doubt in distraught because I've been so distant with her; we weren't this absent from each other before, ever.

Her and Natsuki walked out of the classroom without a word to be spoken. Monika was still quietly wiping off residue of glitter and glue all over the table.

Yuri held a firm look at Monika, seeming to be initiating conversation. I watched while sitting on top of a desk a few seats behind them.

"Monika, let me stay after class for a few minutes or so." Yuri said, almost in a melodramatic sort of demand.

Looking up at Yuri, swiftly striking the rest of the mess off onto the floor. "Why? I'm the president of the club, I'm always the last to leave." Monika declared, now paying full attentiveness to Yuri.

"I need it. I need to spend a few minutes with -kun." Yuri demanded once more.

Monika looked like she was on the verge of saying something, but adjourned her attempt, and simply giggled lightly. "You got it, Yuri..."

While Yuri was practically bludgeoning her out of the room, Monika turned to face me, head peaking out of the door. "Well, -kun, Yuri's really something, isn't she?" she smiled as Yuri shoved her out of the room forcefully, laughing once more; I could hear it fading from outside of the room.

Yuri turned to face me triumphantly, and almost seemed to sprint over to me. "Finally... Finally we're alone..!" she said, smiling warmly. "I've always wanted to tell you something pookie, something I thought I would never reveal to you, but I just don't care anymore. Keeping the truth locked inside of me is practically venom pouring onto my heart at this point."

She held my hands, seeming to be shaking. Her quiver caused my hands to feel feeble. "You know, I've always loved knives. They're so pretty. I'm not weird, am I? Ah, nevermind. I forgot, I don't care anymore. For now on, I've sliced my limbs repeatedly just to remind myself by force that you would never oppose me."

"Pookie... I love you. I love you so much. I love you so much that I've turned my room into a shrine composed of your small elements." she dwindled her hands together whilst writing amongst her skin. "I sleep on the floor, surrounded by your poems, pens, hair... Just about everything I could gather from you, my love." she said, panting profusely.

Yuri quickly shook her head intensely, the reason for it I could not find. "Doesn't it feel good to have someone love you this much? Oh, it feels so fucking good saying that... Love... I love you pookie... I want you to love me..." she shook her head once again, now more violently, her breathing coming to a halt, eyes still widened in animosity.

She jumped up and down, holding my clothes tightly. "I've never felt this happy in my life. You've made me feel so warm and excited to wake up in the morning. I've stopped doing everything in my life just to think about you..." she paused. "...Actually, I've never known what happiness was until your body aroma entered the same room as mine."

Holding my uniform tightly with one hand, feeling my pectorals rapidly with the other, seeming to feel my heart beat.

"Do you accept it pookie? Do you accept my love to you?"

Yuri killed me. The luster of emotion she exalted onto me was overwhelming. But for some reason, I saw past the feeling of unfulfilling lust, and sought the same desire of unending love that she seemed to have been set on this whole time.

I looked at her. She had past the borderline of psychotic, this was purebred insanity. Her eyes bloodshot in a furious, widened manner. Her hands now off of my uniform, scrambling with each other roughly, pressed up against her chest. Her smile hanging open, like a generic smiley-face emoticon.

"Yes."

She stared at me, her tract of breathing ceased to continue.

The knife drove into her stomach immediately, retreating, the vibrant blood pouring out heavily.

Again. The blade invaded her chest, retreating, the two wounds intertwined as the blood pathways linked to each other.

A final time. Her heart had been pierced. Her eyes rolled inside of her head, as she twitched in silence, and plummetted to the floor.

Yuri.

I couldn't describe what I was looking at. Her smile was gone, and the pupils in her magenta eyes disappeared. She was absolutely cold.

I couldn't scream, I couldn't cry, my ability to react died about the same time Yuri did.

There were no sounds to be heard, staring at her lifeless body was all I could think of doing. Actually, no, I couldn't think.

Yuri's corpse layed on the cold steel leg of a desk. The expression on her face remained vapid and stagnant. The knife in her hand left a trail of blood splayed across the room.

I sat there, kneeled down, staring at her. I couldn't even deny what was going on; was I even sad?

Fuck the literature club.

There was nothing more for me to look forward to anymore, there was no feeling left in me after she exited my life; the impact killed me, it was too much to handle.

I didn't even question myself as to why she did it.

I spent the weekend staring at her. Day by day, her blood stains grew browner and browner, and her eyes soon faded of colour alongside it.

Watching her decay so subtly was both beautiful, yet miserable. Absolutely miserable.

We didn't even get to spend time after school together.

To no dismay, I concluded that her death was rendered positive in her mind. Who knows, her life might've been complete in her eyes. It's just too bad I didn't get to reply beforehand.

I love you too, Yuri.

End