Everyone was finally relaxing for the first time since Christmas. It's safe to say that it would be a Christmas that you or the Shelby's would never forget. Your bestfriend had been taken from you, right on his own doorstep.
You were currently sat with Tommy as you shared a cigarette with him and drifted in and out of your own thoughts. It was supposed to be a family celebration type thing and you were included considering you had grown up with the boys.
You looked around at the tables and noticed that Finn wasn't anywhere to be seen. You knew he wasn't in any trouble but you still worried about him. Tommy noticed you glancing around the tables and dismissed you to go and find the boy, you thanked him and a simple nod of his head was the reply you got.
You asked a few of the boys if they had seen where Finn went but they just shook their heads no. You sighed and headed towards the door, signalling Tommy to let him know you would be back in a minute.
It was a particularly cold night and you pulled Finns coat tighter around you, he had given you it earlier on in the day.
You heard a loud sigh from the back of the Garrison and you slowly peered around the corner,just in case it wasn't Finn. Luckily for you though it was.
Finn was leaning against the wall, arms crossed and staring up into the sky. You walked slowly towards him and stood next to him, resting your head on his shoulder. His gaze never moved from the sky and no words were spoken for a while.
Finn finally broke the silence after a long sigh "you think he's in heaven?" You glanced up at him and then back to the sky "nah it's hell for our John boy" Finn let out a soft laugh and nodded in agreement.
"I miss him you know, he was my bestfriend and it's weird not hearing his shouting everywhere" you looked up at Finn as he bowed his head and nodded. "Yeah, it's weird not having him flirting with you just to wind me up" you both laughed at what Finn said and he turned to face you.
"They keep treating me like I'm John,Y/N. But I'm not, I'm not John and I'm never going to be like John. I can't kill someone as easy as he could or anything like that" you gave him a sad look as you waited to see if he would continue but he didn't.
"They know you aren't John, they are just grieving. You are just as amazing as John was maybe even more because you can't do it as easily as he could" Finn walked a few steps ahead of you and kept his back facing you. He kicked a can across the floor and screamed at the sky " WHY THE FUCK DID YOU HAVE TO GO?!?"
Finn dropped to his knees and you could hear the loud sobs racking through his body. You ran towards him as quick as you could and dropped to your knees beside, he pulled you into a hug straight away and you let him cry into your shoulder.
You knew that Finn hadn't had time to grieve properly like the others had, he immediately took on johns former role and helped out the other boys so you just let him cry on you for as long as he needed too.
"Why did he have to go Y/N? I can never be like him"
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~~~~~~~ I only started this book last week I think and it's already got 1k reads!!!!! Thanks you so much guys! Please vote and comment and remember I do take requests if anyone wants one!
