Children of Night and Snow

10. Run For Your Life

Days went by and I barely slept or left my place, the piercing blue eyes still haunting me every time I closed my eyes or turned around. But now that I ran out of food and water, I had no choice but to go back out and steal something. My companion just returned, which meant she'll likely go to sleep soon and I would have a few hours to scavenge. I got up to leave which caused her to look at me curiously. I had no idea why. She rarely looked at me at all and generally, when she did, there was a clear reason like when I brought us the deer meat for the first time or when I returned from my wood search a few days ago. This time however, I had no idea what warranted it. Was she surprised I'm finally leaving to do something after staying here for so long?

I left without a word. There was no point in asking what her problem was. She wouldn't respond anyway. I still remembered her advice so clearly. Nobody cares who you are or what you want. Don't ask questions and preferably don't answer them either. Be quiet, because silence keeps you safe. Yes, she did small favors for me at the beginning, but I knew now that the main reason for that was so that I lived and helped her guard the spot we call home. I was useless to her dead, she had to give me something to start off with. And once I was able to handle myself, there were no more favors. We were each to our own.

As I left the tunnels and made my way through a fresh pile of snow, trying hard to ignore the sudden icy touch of it in the spaces on my body, where my clothes were now torn and ruined from constant use. I will really have to find an alternative soon somehow. But now was not the time. I made my usual way towards the Inn, not stopping for anything or at least I planned to. About half way there, I felt a stir in my core. My wolf. I haven't been able to feel her since I left Summerlands. As if the cold made her hide somewhere so deep within me, nobody could find her. But she was awake now. I could feel her clear as a day as my canines extended and a sudden rise of my body heat made the cold go away.

In any other circumstances, I'd be ecstatic to feel warm, but not right now, not when a potential shift would rip the only clothes I had into pieces, leaving me stuck in my wolf form for survival until I could find something else. Being in wolf form was supposed to make us safer, but here in the places full of wolves twice or triple my size, if the one I met was anything to go by, I would just be a pig for slaughter. I couldn't afford to shift. Not now, maybe not ever again.

I was getting closer to the Inn, while fighting an inner battle inside. She wanted out. And she wanted out now. I didn't understand why and I pleaded with her to not do this. To give me some time to get back to the tunnels and find a safe space, but I was slowly losing my grip on the situation. While we were considered dangerous predators, werewolves as humans called us, we had in fact very little control over the predator side of ours. It came and went, often influenced by strong emotions and turmoils we've faced. That's why our laws were so strict. We couldn't afford to lose the peace we have built because should the Summerlands go to war, bloodshed would follow. And we would be the ones to cause it.

My dad tried to teach me to control myself. In our town he was probably the only one capable of delaying his shifts enough to calm himself down. It didn't always work, but he was a generally very calm man. It took a lot to rile him up. I, on the other hand, had enough temper for the both of us. And I never learnt how to control myself. Now my life depended on it and I had to find a solution. What would dad do?

I didn't get to answer that, because as I was trying to snatch food from an opened crate outside while mentally begging my wolf to calm down, a light came on, shining directly at me.

"There you are, you little thief!" I heard the woman I've been seeing for weeks now, when I would watch for an ideal opportunity hidden in the bushes. "I knew you wouldn't be able to resist my little trap," she chuckled, now towering above me, nothing but menace in her eyes. This was just enough fear for me to lose control I was so hard fighting over and I began to shift.

"Oh no no no, you won't!" she hissed when she noticed what was happening and in a speed of lightning she pulled out a silver knife from somewhere in her coat and without hesitation slashed right across my right leg. I howled in agony, now fully shifted and I ran, well tried to anyway. Adrenalin flooded my veins when I heard the distinctive crack of a shift behind me. She now shifted too, which meant she was going to chase me. I didn't dare look back, I didn't dare think of the pain that was now spreading through my body as I desperately tried to put some distance behind her and I.

Even in the darkness, I could see her massive shadow looming over me as she started to close the distance between us. I was doomed. I was going to get caught and killed. There was no way I was going to get out of this alive. I began resigning to my fate when I spotted an open entry to the tunnels. It wasn't the one I usually used, but at the moment, I didn't care. I took a sharp turn, my leg screaming with pain and before she could snatch me, I disappeared in the tunnels below.

That didn't mean I won, though. She could still easily track me. I had to find a way to lose her. Sewers. They ran simultaneously with the tunnels. The stench was awful but then again, I couldn't imagine I smelled much better at this point, after weeks of no hygiene. I kept running until I found one and just as I heard a howl down the corridor, I jumped in, holding my breath, swimming underneath a set of bars into another section of the corridors.

I wasn't so much swimming as I let the current take me wherever it was heading. As long as it was away from her, I was okay with it. My leg less so, though. I couldn't hold back my whimpers as the dirt from the sewers washed into the open gash the silver blade left behind. If I was healthy and in full strength, this would take days to fully heal. But I wasn't. I was completely exhausted, starving and had no way to clean the wound and possibly stitch it together. I couldn't even shift back because all my clothes were gone.

I washed up in another part of the underground network. Familiar cold and darkness embraced me as I limped through the corridors, hoping to spot something familiar, something to guide me back to my spot. I had no time to feel relieved that I was no longer followed. Or sad because there was no way I could go and steal from that Inn again. Or afraid of the darkness surrounding me and for the future I now probably didn't have. No, I had to keep going.

Exhaustion was blurring my vision as I wandered through the complex network of the tunnels for what seemed like hours now. It was only the fear of a giant wolf with piercing blue eyes that kept me going. I couldn't face another possible conflict right now. I couldn't even face the first one. The thoughts of what I would do were haunting me, keeping me going when I spotted the familiar door and I nearly wept with relief. I was almost back to my place. I was safe for now.