Black Hole Sun [Harry Potter/Twilight]

XXVII : The Wolf and The Lamb

BELLA

Bella laid lifeless in Jacob's bed, as he was beside her.

He had been recounting what had been happening on the reservation while she's been gone. Bella knew he was just trying to keep her mind off of what had happened. And through his tales, he was right. She was distracted.

She had missed so much, gone for so long since Jacob had decided they couldn't be friends anymore...But what stood out to her the most about the wolf-pack, was Jacob's explanation of imprinting.

She had felt relief when he told her he had not yet imprinted. Jacob promised it would never happen, as he looked at her with such intensity. It wasn't fair to him, for her to feel that way. To feel relief at the fact he had not found his soulmate.

Bella knew how Jacob felt about her. And it wasn't fair for her to want to stake a claim for him. But Jacob...He was simply a perpetually happy person, and he carried that happiness with him like an aura, sharing it with whoever was near him. Like an earthbound sun, whenever someone was within his gravitational pull, Jacob warmed them. It was natural, a part of who he was. And though she knew it wasn't fair to want to stake a claim...She knew she could.

Bella stared at the man laying next to her, his warm arm comfortably around her. He was not her Jacob, but he could be. His face was familiar and beloved. In so many real ways, she did love him. He was her comfort, her safe harbor.

Even being held by him like the way he was, in his bed and warm...It didn't feel brotherly when he held her like that. It just felt nice. Warm and comforting and familiar.

Right now, she could choose to have him belong to her. And she knew he would never leave her.

She had that much within her power. Even now, after their fight and her choosing Edward over him...She knew she could do it. What if? What was the right thing to do?

Bella couldn't imagine her life without Jacob now—She cringed away from the idea of even trying to imagine that. Somehow, he'd become essential to her survival once again. And maybe she could survive once more. If she had Jacob.

Edward was gone.

Jacob was there.

True love was forever lost. The prince was never coming back to kiss her awake from her enchanted sleep. She was not a princess, after all. So what was the fairy-tale protocol for other kisses? The mundane kind that didn't break any spells?Maybe it would be easy—like holding his hand or having his arms around her. Maybe it would feel nice. Maybe it wouldn't feel like a betrayal. Besides, who was she betraying, anyway?

She had been betrayed in every way already. Promised a life that was disappearing before her very eyes. She had known it was coming. It started with Edward's obsession with that girl...Then he would simply forget Bella. He wouldn't walk her to class. He wouldn't come to her room. He wouldn't join her at her home...Edward had been keeping things from her. And now she knew why.

"I miss you every day, Bella. It's not the same without you" Jacob whispered, holding her tightly.

"I know and I'm sorry, Jake..."

"Everything could go back to the way things were, before..."

Bella felt herself nod, as she felt empty. Too much was going on in her mind. Too much of preparing for her empty future. She knew she would survive it, she had done it once before...That much helped her. But still, knowing that didn't erase the pain she felt in her chest. She was still trapped in a nightmare that she couldn't get out of.