Diary of an Angry Husband | Jinkook ✔️

Thirty

"Thank you so much for seeing me on such short notice," Jin said with a smile, sitting down before the therapist.

With a warm smile on her face, Dr. Chye crossed her legs and leaned back in her chair, "right, my assistant mentioned you said it was urgent. So what's going on? Have you been working on those exercises I gave you and your husband?"

Jin shook his head, "Yes, and no. A lot has transpired since we last saw you. I don't know where to start, honestly. I moved back in with Jungkook. He has cancer, prostate cancer, I think it's in the early stage, but I am not sure; I haven't seen anything to confirm that yet, and it's bothering me because I don't know the health of my husband, I don't know if something will happen to him. I couldn't sleep last night, and today I am struggling to function properly.

My most trusted worker and best friend just told me today; he is taking time off for almost a year to stay home. I don't know what to do about that, because I need him there, but I can't force him to be there. So now, the responsibility of ensuring the company continues to grow and survive is on me.

I wanted to take some time off, you know to be there for Jungkook during this time, even though he never asked me to, I wanted to, because if it were me, he wouldn't hesitate to do it, but me, here I am, I am hesitating now because what do I do with work?

I can't abandon my job, and I can't abandon my husband either; it's just so frustrating. Maybe if the cancer isn't so bad, I don't need to take off work; that's what I have been thinking. He seems okay, but he is also Jungkook; he is okay until he is not. Then, he will hold things in, even if it's killing him so that it doesn't trigger a problem. Like our marriage, I know he is tired of me because it must have taken a lot to reach this point; he is not one to give up easily. It seems like I took our marriage for granted sometimes.

Then there is our daughter. She loves Jungkook more than she loves me. I am an absent parent to her, but it's not by choice; work takes a lot from me. Although Jungkook seems to think I choose work over them, I don't. I just, it's hard for me to explain it to him, work requires me to be busy, when I can put something off with them and do it the next day, with work I can't.

I have deadlines, and I have clients, clients that depend on me. I have employees all over who depend on the company's success to continue receiving a salary to take care of their families. So I hold a lot of responsibility, one wrong slip, and I not only fail myself, but I also fail my father, I fail my workers, and my clients get impacted.

Nobody understands this part of it well, although Jimin does. Jungkook, I used to think he understood it well, but now, he seems to think I don't care about him or Ae Ri.

Ae Ri thinks that way more so, I believe, but I have been trying to fix my relationship with her. I want to fix my relationship with her. I don't want her growing up thinking I don't love her; I do. Everything I do, I do for her too, this company, Jungkook and I assets, all of it, it's hers. I know she doesn't understand that now, but she will see the things I am doing one day. It's because I want her to be happy in the future and live well.

I guess not only her, but our new baby, I am pregnant by the way, found out after I was sexually assaulted and got brought to the hospital, but now they want to put me on bed rest. I can't go on bedrest! Not in my present situation, but if I don't, then I will end up having another miscarriage.

Jungkook won't forgive me, and I don't know. I have even contemplated just having another abortion. I had one before without Jungkook knowing. That's what took us here, he says I was selfish, and I guess he is right. I did it because I was thinking about work and what it would have cost me to have a child when I needed to be up and about.

If I have one, he has cancer; depending on how severe it is, he may never have another child, and I don't know; I am lost. So I need your help Dr. Chye, and this might be too much. I just don't know anymore, and I need help."

Jin slumped back in the chair he was in and wiped the tears that had formed in his eyes while talking. Dr. Chye, on the other hand, sat upright, taking her glasses off and placing them on her desk. Then, closing her notepad firmly, she turned her attention back to Jin.

"I now understand your point that a lot has happened, but I am grateful that you have reached out to me for help. That took a lot of strength and courage; not many people think to do that when facing a great deal. You should give yourself credit for doing that, sure your husband and daughter would be proud knowing you did this, but most importantly, you should be proud of yourself too. You said a lot, and I want us to spend time addressing some of these roadblocks that are happening and the struggles you are facing, but before I start, do you have anywhere you need to be within the next two hours?"

Jin shook his head, "no."

"Great, give me one moment. I am going have my assistant cancel my schedule for the remainder of the day-"

"Dr. Chye, please, you don't have to do that."

Dr. Chye looked at Jin as she stood up, "yes, I do, you are here seeking my help, and I want to help you in the best way that I can, which means making you a priority today. Now, give me one moment. I will be back."

Jin sat down, not knowing what to say as Dr. Chye left the room. Taking out his phone, he quickly glanced through his work emails, seeing one that he thought needed his immediate attention; he responded to it, then sent his assistant instructions on a meeting he needed to be scheduled. Unfortunately, he was so busy working on his phone that he hadn't realized Dr. Chye had returned and sat across from him.

Dr. Chye observed him as he spoke out loud to himself while responding to emails, including voicing his frustration regarding who wasn't doing their job and what he asked them to do. Then, after a while, he looked up, shocked to see Dr. Chye, "h-how long have you been back?" he asked, closing his phone and putting it down.

"About twenty minutes, but you were busy, and I didn't want to interrupt."

"Oh my, I am so sorry, it's work, a new client, and it's just, I am sorry, I will take care of it when I leave here." Jin gave her an apologetic smile, but he was anxious to finish up the email he was writing, and Dr. Chye could tell this by how he began shaking his leg and looking down at his phone.

"It's fine; why don't you finish up what you were doing? I will grab some coffee, and then we can continue." She said, smiling at Jin.

His eyes widened as he stared at her, "are you sure?"

"Yes, absolutely."

As the words left her mouth, Jin had his phone back in hand and resumed responding to the email he wanted to.

From the corner of her office, while making her coffee, Dr. Chye observed him, as she was beginning to realize from what Jungkook had written down when he and Jin visited her and how Jin spoke about work today and current actions. He was a workaholic, a serious and real mental condition that not many put focus on. She only dealt with a few patients with this as most people with workaholism couldn't see that they had a problem.