A New Chance To Live

14

Warnings:
-GAY PANIC

George's POV

It was the day of the party, but I had no idea when Sapnap and Clay were picking me up. For as far as I knew Sapnap's dad was driving and I looked at my mother who sat on the couch.

'I'm nervous,' I muttered.

'For the people there or the party?' she asked with a soft smile.

I rolled my eyes and sighed out. 'Both, if I'm honest.'

'I'm sure they will love you there.'

I shrugged. 'I get a bit nervous, I want to look good for everyone today. Do I look good? I got my most formal clothes.'

My mother smiled and stood up, giving me a kiss on my cheek. 'You look amazing as always, honey. Do you have your inhaler?'

I nodded and tapped my pocket. 'Does my hair look good? Would anyone find me weird?'

'You look great, stop worrying about it so much. No one can dislike you, you're such a sweet and amazing boy.'

I giggled. 'Thank you,' I whispered shyly. I heard a car driving down the road and sighed softly.

'Stay calm, honey. It's going to be a lot of fun. Call me when you don't feel okay.'

'But dad has our car.'

'I'll ask the neighbours, don't worry. Have fun,' she said as she kissed my cheek again. 'I love you, sweetie.'

'I love you too,' I said with a smile as I sighed again and walked to the stairs to go downstairs. My mother walked with me and I quickly took a puff of my inhaler before opening the door.

My mother smiled. 'Call me when you need me, honey.'

I nodded and walked outside to the car. I slowly opened the door of the car and sat down on the backseat. I felt very uncomfortable and looked to my side to see Clay sitting.

'Hi,' he said with a smile.

Sapnap and his dad turned around. Sapnap's dad shook my hand and Sapnap greeted me. 'How are you, George?' he asked.

'Uh- I'm okay,' I said with a smile. 'I'm a little bit nervous.'

'Same,' Clay giggled. 'But it's going to be okay, I've always been a bit scared, but then it ended up being fine.'

'Is there uh- alcohol? I don't really like that.'

'I'm not sure,' Sapnap answered. 'But Clay, Bad and I don't drink. Most are underaged as well.'

I nodded. 'And smoking?'

'I'm not sure either, but I'm sure there's a room you can sit in if they do.'

'Okay,' I muttered. Sapnap and his dad started talking a bit and I looked at Clay. He was also wearing a bit more formal clothes and I smiled.

'Do you like it?' he giggled shyly. 'I might have spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to fix my hair and get the right clothes.'

I giggled. 'I spent a bit shorter, but it was quite long as well. I just want to look good at my first party.'

'You look great,' Clay complimented me with a sweet smile on his face.

'You look great too,' I said with a soft giggle. 'You always do.' I whispered the words and Clay cleared his throat.

'Do you mean that?' he muttered shyly. He opened his mouth to say something, but Sapnap's dad turned around.

'We are here,' he said. 'Have fun, guys!'

I smiled and thanked him for driving us, stepping outside of the car after that. Clay stepped out too and ran to me, smiling.

He waited before talking and we went inside first. All of us congratulated the people who were celebrating their birthdays and then we sat together on a few chairs.

'I'm getting some water and I might talk to some people for a bit.'

'Okay,' Clay said. He smiled and Sapnap walked off, leaving Clay and me alone together.

He was looking at me and seemed to get lost into it. I waved my hand in front of his face and noticed Clay got startled. 'Sorry.'

'It's fine.'

'Do I make you uncomfortable? I know you know I'm bisexual now, I hope I'm not making it weird. Are you uh- even into guys? Uh- I mean, I shouldn't have asked that. I'm not uh- hitting on you.'

I giggled and shrugged. 'I don't know if I'm into boys or girls. I don't think I'm into boys, but I'm not that busy with it.'

Clay had a smile on his face. 'I wasn't hitting on you, I don't want a relationship anymore anyway. You're cute, though. Uh- y-yes. I mean, no. Uh- I-.'

I grinned and laughed at his panic.

'I didn't mean to say that, I'm so sorry. This is really weird, what am I even saying? I was just complimenting you, not in a strange way.'

'Do you actually think I'm cute? That's not weird to me at all, you're a handsome guy. I think that's normal to say.'

'Uh- yes,' he whispered. 'I'm so sorry, I wasn't supposed to say this at all.'

'That's sweet,' I giggled. 'I've never had someone call me cute next to my mother.'

'I made this so uncomfortable, I'm so sorry,' Clay muttered with the reddest face he had ever had. 'I'm leaving, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for saying that, I'm not hitting on you out of nowhere.'

'It's totally fine.'

'Do you find me dumb now?' Clay whispered as he looked down to his hands.

'I don't, you made me really happy by saying that. I feel really happy around you, you always make me smile no matter what.'

'I'm so sorry for asking. I'm leaving, I made this way too uncomfortable. I'm acting like a fool, I'm going to get some water to calm down. I just don't want you to leave me like the others did...'

He stood up with tears in his eyes and walked off. I decided to leave him for a little as I suddenly felt the air around me feel weird and thicker than normal. It caused my chest to tighten and I looked up to see what was going on.

As soon as I realised three people smoking almost next to me, I stood up to go away. Unfortunately everywhere I went there were people with cigarettes, causing it to get worse and worse.

I ended up sitting alone in a room while my chest got tighter and tighter. I was getting an asthma attack, but I was all alone.

1062 words