Returned to Sender - Scarlett Johansson

Part 5

Sawyer's POV

They have got to be out of their minds.

This is some sort of sick joke, right? I mean, there were my adoptive parents first, which led to my stay with him. Then I became homeless and slept under trees, and now I am supposedly going back to the same person who gave me away after only knowing me for a few minutes. I mean, you just can't write this stuff down. There is no way this is really my life.

My 'mother' was sitting in the chair next to me, now sleeping, so I allowed myself to roll over and just stare at her. She's super pretty, I will give her that; in fact, the longer I looked at her, the more I realised she looked just like me. It's almost creepy how similar we look. How had I not noticed that? I'm slipping; I need to pay more attention and stop freaking out. I had so many questions, why did she leave? Why was she back? What's happening now? Who is she? More importantly, why was I not good enough for her?

It was all spinning around my head. Not to mention how easy it would be for me to hate her, how I wish I could blame her for what has happened since she gave me away, blame her for what he did to me. But that would be too easy; my poor brain may want to hate her, but my stupid heart just wanted a hug from the older woman; I craved safety, and something deep inside of me told me she could give me that. I don't know what it is about her, but she just seems to be what I need right now.

She seemed to radiate safety, something I don't remember having anymore. I just wanted her to comfort me and promise me that he was gone and that she was going to make everything better. But I knew she couldn't do that; I bet she doesn't even know anything about him, never mind what he did to me.

I was torn, and the longer I stared at the older version of myself sleeping in the uncomfortable chair next to me, the more I wanted her to just hold me. I don't remember the last time someone held me. I'm not entirely sure anyone really truly has held me. She just gives good hugs; she has that sort of energy about her.

The small act of her sleeping in such an uncomfortable-looking object showed that she cared at least somewhat about me. Which is a lot more than anyone else in this world. If she didn't care, I'm sure she could have gone home and just returned for me tomorrow since I'm apparently leaving with her in the morning. Maybe she does care? Perhaps I should give her a chance?

She could be nice after all, but then again, he started as nice, and I refuse to go through anything like that ever again; I couldn't survive anything like that again.

Her hand had fallen onto the bed as she slept, and I just couldn't stop myself. Slowly, not to wake her, I shifted closer and closer to her until her hand was within reach; I thought about what to do next. But before I knew it, I had curled myself around her hand, hugging her arm as much as I could despite the pain in my side.

Even with the pain in my side, I felt safer and more comfortable than ever; I think that was her doing. For the first time, maybe ever, I felt safe. With that, I drifted off to sleep; for the first time in a very long time, I didn't have a single dream about him.

Waking up peacefully was something I hadn't done in a long time, yet that's what I was doing. I felt calm for once as I snuggled further into the bed; I felt warm and safe, which was a new sensation.

Yawning, I slowly opened my eyes and looked up, expecting to see the ceiling. Instead, I was met with a pair of green eyes staring down at me; I just stared back, unsure of what was happening and still too sleepy to react fully. "Morning baby", I heard a raspy voice say softly; before I could consider my actions, I whispered back a quiet "morning" of my own, just staring at her as a massive smile formed on her face.

Then at the sound of my own words, I jumped into action; I literally jumped, which was a big mistake as I hissed in pain, reaching for my ribs in the process. A groaning "ouch" fell out of my lips before I could remind myself not to show any pain. She is going to be mad. She is going to be so angry. I touched her without permission. I cuddled her, and cuddles are for babies. And I showed her I was in pain. I am going to be in so much trouble. He would have me in the attack for a month for doing less than that. I don't even want to think about what she is going to do to me as punishment.