Kyle

Chapter 5

Sarah's POV

I was holding hands with Kyle, and we were currently walking to his house. I'm still don't know how to feel about this. My emotions are all over the place. First off, Kyle doesn't seem to have a problem with me being a vampire? I mean any normal wolf would kill me in a second, because we are enemies. But that is just what I learned in school, so have times changed? Are we allowed to be in peace with one another, or are we still suppose to hate each other's guts. I don't know it's just so confusing. Second off, apparently I'm Kyle's mate, which I have heard some things about them. What I heard is that you pretty much spend the rest of your life with them, unless you reject each other, but that small part of me tells me not to reject him. Which I'm giving into right now. I guess since that desire to kill is gone. Third off, Kyle said I had to become the Luna of his pack. Which means me supposedly being an enemy to wolves, I now have to help rule a pack of them. Fourth off, What am I going to tell Ramona. I'm suppose to be a good example for her and teach her that wolves are bad and all of that stuff, but now since I'm a mate to one, am I suppose to just teach her to love them now? I mean she already loves fluf-Kyle. All of this is just too much for me to handle at the moment. Kyle gave my hand a slight squeeze, and gave me a smile. I gave him a small smile back.  I guess the last thing that is bothering me is what am I going to do about feeding. I can't keep going through this guilt of killing an innocent animal, and I can't turn my emotions off, I will never. It will just turn me into a murderous monster like my father. Before I knew it we were at Kyle's house.

It was huge, and he lives here all alone? "It's pretty nice huh?" He said with a chuckle. I smiled. He walked me to the door. "If you think the outside is nice, wait until you see the inside." He said with a huge smile. All I can feel coming off of him is happiness. Which made me happy I guess.He was right the inside was even more nicer. From , tiled floors, to chandeliers hanging to the ceiling.  "Well I guess we can go get you cleaned up now." He said. I nodded my head. He held my hand all the way to his bathroom. Which was amazing. He let go of my hand and got a wet rag. Before I knew what he was doing he grabbed my waist, and picked me up putting me on his bathroom counter.  He was about to dab my face with the rag when I grabbed his wrist. His face gave a look of worry and confusion. "I can clean my own face, I have done it many times before." As much as I didn't like cleaning blood off my face because it just makes me more upset, I can still do it. Which I don't like being treated like a child who can't do anything. That isn't me, and I especially don't need a guy doing it for me. I don't need a guy doing anything for me really. Which what happened in the woods was a moment of weakness for me, and I didn't need him to comfort me. "Sarah, just let me help you. You had a pretty ruff day from what I can tell, so please?" As much as I didn't want him to help me, I let him. He dabbed the wash cloth around my mouth. He probably thinks of me as a monster, even though he said he would love me whatever I am. "You probably hate how I'm a monster," I said immediately looking down. He lifted my chin up so I was looking into his eyes, and he was looking into mine. "I don't think of you as a monster. You can't help what you become, but you can help how you think about it. I mean have you seen what wolves can do? I only been an alpha for two months, and I have came close to ripping innocent animals apart for food. Especially around full moons, and eclipses. Because its in a wolf's nature to hunt, and I can't control what my wolf does sometimes. So you can't help what you have done, because it's in your nature." "I know it's in my nature, but luckily when your wolf is in control you don't feel the guilt or anything. With me I feel all the guilt, I could just turn it all off. But I swore when I got my powers that I never would." He looked confused. "Turn off what?" "My emotions, if I just turn them of-" His face turned serious. "Don't finish that sentence. If you turn your emotions off, I will not know what to do with myself." I just gave him a small smile, and he continued to wipe my face.  Once he was done he helped me down from the counter.