First There Was You

Chapter 5: Elle

June 14

Lake Rosseau, Muskoka

My arms are screaming in agony. Hudson's been pushing me for hours in the water, and even Theo is starting to feel bad for me. I can see it on his face every time Hudson shouts, "Let's go again."

When I hear those three words, I wish the lake would just swallow me whole, suck me under so I can rest. I suck at water skiing.

I know it's not that hard, and I'm convinced it's not a physical problem but a mental one.

I was in minor a water skiing incident, five, maybe six years ago. Mum and Dad bought a pair of learner skis, which were tethered directly to the boat, rather than relying on the strength of the skier. The handle was just a dummy, tied to the rope and skis attached to the stern.

Geordie had been in the water with me, helping me stand up as the boat accelerated. Mum had been on the dock taking pictures. When I fell, Dad, forgetting I was attached to the boat by my skis, gunned the engine, turning to come to find me in the water.

Unfortunately, my feet hadn't come out of the skis, so I was dragged underwater through the hard waves of the flat wake for several feet. My brother screamed from his seat in the boat, and Dad stopped immediately, diving in after me to make sure I was okay.

Sure enough, I was only a little waterlogged, but too scared to try again. I haven't been successful in any of my numerous attempts since.

It certainly doesn't look like I'm going to be successful today. I only hope my muscles recover before Thursday and Friday for my horse show.

We've been zipping back and forth the same stretch of water for what feels like an entire day. Glancing at my watch, I can see almost three hours have gone by. I groan, but mentally prepare myself for one more try, giving Hudson the thumbs up. Theo rolls his eyes, but he throttles down, gradually getting up to speed.

This time, despite my shaking arms and legs, I stand. I'm already unsteady enough; the muscle fatigue certainly doesn't help matters. But I finally make it up, and for a few shaky meters, I ski. Triumph spikes through me, and I cheer myself on.

My mental party came too soon. We hit some small waves, which catch the tips of the skis. I get launched forward as the skis pitch vertically. I actually fly out of them, landing a few feet away, crashing down onto the wake.

That's it. No more today. I tap my head with my hand, giving Hudson the sign that I'm through. They circle back around, Hudson reaching down to grab the skis as the boat drifts by.

"You were so close there, Elle. You actually made it up! Told you I was a good teacher, didn't I?"

"I think that was a fluke, Hudson. God, I'm like jello, I can't feel my arms and legs anymore." I roll onto my back in the water, unclipping the snug life jacket that makes me feel claustrophobic. I throw it at Hudson, and it hits him square in the chest, soaking wet. "You're not a teacher, you're a drill sergeant."

He laughs, leaning on the side of the boat, looking down at me with a smile, like I was kidding.

I wasn't.

Theo takes advantage of the break and dives in off the bow, swimming around to float with me. "You did good, Ellie, no matter what he says. Give yourself a break."

He turns his attention to Hudson, "I'm telling you, Hud, she needs someone to get up with her, start from the dock, or a boom, then try water starting again when she's steadier."

I want someone to help me, not push me to do it by myself only to fail time and time again. I get too anxious in the water alone when the engine starts, and the drag of the water presses against me.