I don't want to be a Malfoy anymore (drarry fanfic)

Chapter 9: imperfect malfoy

Hi guys!
Sorry I haven't updated this story in a while, I was on holiday.
⚠️ But just letting u know this story has rape and abuse in it so proceed with caution ⚠️

When I've stopped, they help me up but I feel dizzy and weak, I can't hold myself up, I instantly collapse when they let go, hitting my head on the sink.
I must have fainted as I can only see black, but I don't wake up.
Instead, I see memories.

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"Strip down," Lucius shouts at me.
"To naked?" I ask worriedly.
"Yes!" He yells at me, I obey, there's one thing I've learnt about life, if your asked to do something, do it straight away or there will be consequences.
Once naked, Voldemort and grey back entered, I was frightened for my life.
"Good Lucius," Voldemort sneered.
They all had evil grins plastered on their faces but I couldn't go anywhere.
Father started fiddling with his belt and then turned me around, and hit me over and over again on the back.
Then I got crucioed for what felt like a million times. The cruciatus curse always felt horrible it was like 10,000 shards of glass cutting my skin from the inside.

Just as I thought it was going to end, they did something unforgivable.
They put a silencing charm in the room and took it in turns, they shoved themselves into me, causing me to scream in agony, but no one could hear me. It felt horrible and made me feel dirty, it was horrifying, this thought was always horrible and I absolutely hated every second of it.

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I woke up to a big, bright light and jolted awake screaming in agony.
I accidentally woke up Severus, Albus and Minerva that were all sat in chairs next to me.
"Draco, Draco, calm down, it's ok, your safe," Albus said trying to comfort me, but I didn't want comfort, I wanted to die.
I wanted to die so all of the pain would be gone.

"Can I g-go to t-the bathroom please?" I asked nervously.
They nodded their heads in approval and I got up and went to the bathroom.
I looked in the mirror and I saw myself with tangled, messy hair, pale skin and deep baggy eyes. That's how I saw the imperfect Malfoy I was. I hated myself.
But then I unexpectedly threw up the contents in my stomach, which was little, until there was nothing except from stomach acid, I threw that up too.

I then got up and something caught my eye, a razor, glistening by how the light hit it.
"Perfect..." I whispered, picking it up, and rolled up my sleeve showing my pale, bony arm, with the dark mark on it, I bought the knife up to my skin and cut it, leaving a dark crimson liquid on my arm dripping on the floor.
It numbed the pain for a moment but it soon came back again, and I then cut more and more, deeper and deeper, until I heard a rapid knocking on the door, shocking me. I accidentally dropped the razor.
"Draco, are you alright in there?" Snape asked.
"Yeah, just give me a second," I replied quickly as I cleaned the razor, and put it back in its original place and pulled down my robe.

I quickly stepped outside and Severus led me to my bed where Dumbledore and Mcgonnogall and Madame Pomfrey was waiting for us.
"Now, Draco, your going to stay in here for a week and we're all going to keep a close eye on you and-" but she cut herself off staring at my robe on my arm.

I looked down and noticed the blood dripping down my arm and below my robe.
"Omg! What the hell!" She screamed, scaring me and pulled my robe off and started cleaning and bandaging the cuts.
"I-I" I started but couldn't form words and just cried into Severus' shoulder, making his clothes wet. He stroked my hair and rubbed circles on my back calming me.

I didn't think they would notice, god I should have thought this through. But I didn't want to look up, I didn't want to cope with the pain, I didn't want to live anymore.

Why can't I just die? It's not like anyone would care, would they? If anything, they would be happy. They wouldn't have to cope with a suicidal, depressed, abused teenager.

And I could be at peace, and be happy.

I could be happy.
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So I hope you enjoyed this chapter.
And thanks for hitting 100+ reads on this story it makes me so happy. :)
So thank you all so much

-peaxe