Pink Star Ateez x Seonghwa

26

Seonghwa's pov

A week later, and it was time for the second evaluation. I hadn't felt well all week, and couldn't point out what was causing my stress and anxiety. I had to perform for the judges regardless.

"I'll be singing "Be With You" today." I stood at the small taped "x" on the ground. I lifted the microphone to my lips and began singing when I heard the song come to it.

  "Seonghwa, you've passed, but barely. Please work harder on it." The vocal judge said, sighing a bit. I furrowed my brows and nodded, walking out of the room with misty eyes so Hangyul could be evaluated.

  I walked to another practice room on the third floor, deciding against going to Hongjoong's studio. I slid down the wall as my eyes dripped tears. I curled into a ball and just cried, for how long I don't even know.

My phone buzzed and buzzed with calls and texts but I silenced it. I knew it was silly of me to keep my suffering to myself, but I didn't want to worry my soulmates.

It wasn't until an hour of crying later did anyone find me. Ateez's producer Eden was the one to find me rather than any of my soulmates, making me feel even worse knowing more than they were looking for me.

"Seonghwa, what happened? You passed!" Eden said, smiling softly as he knelt down beside me. He pulled out his phone and opened a contact, which I quickly realized was Hongjoong's.

"Please, don't text him. I don't want any of them to see me like this..."

"Seonghwa, you and Jongho kissed each other's marks; he can feel everything you're going through. You've really gave them a scare," Eden said, reminding me of what happens with soulmates.

"Shit, not Jongho." I jumped up from the ground. I thanked Eden before rushing out into the hallway, calling Jongho's phone.

"Hwa, what's wrong? Why are we crying?" Jongho asked, sniffling back some tears.

"Jongho, I'm sorry. I forgot about soulmates being able to feel everything after we kiss each other's marks and-" I sobbed again, trying my best not to cry anymore but failing miserably as I had done another phone call that I wasn't ready to make.

"Hwa, it's okay. Where are you?"

"I'm on the third floor. Where are you?"

"Still in Hongjoong's studio. He's beside me; he wouldn't let me leave since I'm also crying. Hongjoong is really good at soothing by the way," Jongho said, laughing a bit along with a second voice I recognized as Hongjoong's.

"Okay, I'll be there in a bit."

I made my way to Hongjoong's studio, wiping my tears on my shirt on the way.

"Jongho, I'm sorry," I said, stepping inside. Jongho jumped up from Hongjoong's embrace to instead embrace me. He pulled my face to his shoulder and held me tightly.

"No more secret sadness. Come to us. Please? It scared me- and everyone else- when I suddenly started crying." Jongho caressed my back and held me, which made me cry once again from the comforting feeling.

"But I don't deserve you guys," I said, my voice sounding a little hoarse from my crying. Jongho only shushed me and kept me close.

"You wouldn't have our soul marks if you didn't deserve us. Hwa, come here for a bit," Hongjoong said, opening his arms towards me. I walked into his arms and hid my face in his neck.

"I can't make it into the group- I wont be able to debut with you. Hangyul is too good."

  "You'll just have to work even harder, my love. I know you enjoy time with us, but maybe for the next week you should use as much time as you can to improve vocally since rapping is the last category. You can use my studio to rehearse; I'll give you the code." Hongjoong held me closely just as Jongho did. I felt soothed by the brunette who stroked my back.

  "Won't that bother you if I'm in here alone?" I asked. Hongjoong kissed my forehead.

  "You know how sound equipment works and know not to touch it if you aren't gonna work with it. Stick by that and I don't mind at all. All I ask is that you at least come home for eight hours of real rest." Hongjoong said. I nodded and stayed in his arms.

"Can we head home for tonight? I don't think I'm in a state where I can rehearse properly," I mumbled. Hongjoong caressed my head sweetly with a smile.

  "Of course; let's head out."

We all made it into the van, the ride home being silent apart from soft music on the radio.

"I'm sorry for scaring you guys; I just don't feel like I deserve you, or feel like I'll be able to make it into the group with you." I looked down at my hands on my lap instead of at anyone else in the van. I felt two hands take mine in theirs.

"You deserve us; if anything, we don't deserve you. You've saved our lives from Heartless and kept our group from possible disbandment from lack of support in the company shares. You've been nothing but good to us, Hwa." Mingi gently kissed my forehead.

"And even if you don't debut, you'll still go on tour with us. We won't leave you here by yourself, lovely," Yunho said. He and Mingi were the two to hold my hands. I smiled softly and nodded.

"Thank you," I said.