𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬 ˢᵛᵗ

eighteen ♬

In the dorms

"Guys it's starting!" Mingyu bellowed as the group huddled around the television. The space was small, the boys squishing against each other to get a view. Snacks of all kinds were bundled in their arms, ready for them to munch away at. Amidst the crowd, JJ or Bori were nowhere to be seen.

"I've never seen Hidden Gems before," Jun admitted, his arm reaching for the box of chocolate peperos laying on Seungcheol's lap.

"That's because it's never been aired before," Seungcheol said, batting away Jun's hand. He passed him a packet of chilli crips instead, to which he reluctantly agreed.

"I'm excited to see our Chae-ri on tv," Jeonghan exclaimed as he stuck the straw into the banana milk in his hand. He then gave it to Dino, who accepted it quickly and sipped happily. The screen changed fast, from advert to show opening, getting the attention of everyone.

"Hello and welcome everybody!"

"No way..." Vernon gawked, the others wearing the same expression. "Is that.."

"Yoo Jae-suk!?" Seungkwan shouted bewildered. Wonwoo smacked him across the back of the head telling him to quieten down. Seungkwan apologised shyly, calming himself down. The show continued, leading on to the introductions. The screen cut to nine girls standing in a semi circle, each sporting a very different style.

"Look there's Chae-ri!" Minghao pointed towards the girl dressed in the overalls.

"She looks so cute," Soonyoung cooed, leaning into Jihoon's shoulder in front of him. Seokmin, who had been quietly feasting on his tray of kimbap at the side, shot Soonyoung an angry look. The boy laughed in return, but retracted his previous statement.

Three introductions had passed, the trainees waiting only for their friend. When it was the blonde bombshell Kang Paris' turn, Seungkwan's eyes grew wide in shock and he clambered over to Seokmin.

"Seungkwan cmon!" Seungcheol scolded as a foot knocked his arm, spilling peperos onto Mingyu's legs. Seungkwan ignored him, still making his way over to Seokmin who sat at the other side next to Jeonghan. He placed himself in the space between the two and leaned into Seokmin's ear.

"Seokmin I might be wrong," He whispered, disregarding Jeonghan's curious eyes that stared at them. "But I think that's Kang Paris. That Kang Paris."

Seokmin lifted his head in surprise, acknowledging the girl on the screen for the first time. The sight of her shining hair and graceful smile froze him, eyes widening in both shock and fear.

"Seokmin you ok?" Joshua asked concerned. He was quick to notice the sudden mood change in Seokmin, his eyes followed Seungkwan ever since he'd left him and Vernon's side.

"It's Kang Paris," Seungkwan's voice was brimming with nerves.

"Kang Paris?" Vernon, Soonyoung, Jeonghan and Mingyu all blurted out. They exchanged worried looks with each other, whereas the other boys remained out of the loop.

"What's Kang Paris got to do with Seokmin?" Seungcheol asked.

"She's the girl who liked Seokmin back in Middle School," Soonyoung now sat up straight and turned to face the rest. "And ruined his life in doing so."

"What do you mean?" Dino's head perked up, momentarily stopping him from drinking his banana milk.

"What he means is," Vernon continued. "That she made it her life's purpose to get Seokmin to like her back. She was obsessed, spreading rumours so that he couldn't lean on anyone but her. They were friends for a while, and things were good between them. But when he rejected her feelings, she held onto him even tighter than before. She harassed him daily, claiming that she was all he had and that she deserved his love after all she had done for him. The torment was too much for him, ultimately leading him to drop out and become a trainee early."

"Oh god.." Jun mumbled shaking his head in disbelief.

"Did you do anything about it?" Minghao asked. "Like reporting it?"

"I couldn't," Seokmin sighed. "She was a senior, so her words held power over mine and the damage had already been done by then. The only thing I thought of doing was leaving it all behind, letting myself start over."

At that point, all the boys had dropped the snacks that they were holding and held Seokmin instead. They felt guilty for not knowing the hardship in which their friend had gone through, showing their support via a group hug. Seokmin laughed, claiming to be okay as he brushed off their arms. Yet deep down, it hurt him to see her all over again. He'd buried the pain of her memory, and it scared him badly knowing just how close she was.

"It's okay," Jeonghan comforted him, patting his back. "You don't have to watch if you can't. I'm sure she'll understand-"

"No no I'll watch," Seokmin interjected, giving Jeonghan a small smile.

"Speaking of the devil," Mingyu redirected the focus. "Here she comes."

Chae-ri appeared on screen. Her dark eyes glowed beautifully, her young face housing an elegant smile. Cheers and hollers filled the room, banishing the sad atmosphere from earlier.

"Wow she looks great!" Dino cheered, hugging Joshua's arm in delight. The rest of the night they continued watching the remainder of the show, which was boring background segments on each contestant. The real challenges were airing tomorrow, and they all just happen to have their performance tests then.

"I can't wait for tomorrow's episode," Jihoon yawned, excited but tired.

"But the performance tests.." Vernon's voice faded away, sleep overcoming him.

"We're all tired, so let's head to bed," Seungcheol stood up and began picking up the drowsy boys around him. "It's a long day tomorrow, so we must get enough rest."

He gently ushered them out the room, and watched as they sleepily stumbled their way to the dorms. Seokmin hung behind, the weight of tonight's revelation unloaded on to him.

"Seokmin ah," Seungcheol called out. Seokmin carried on sitting, his glossed over eyes staring at the hard floor in front of him. His eyebrows were scrunched, like he was thinking very hard about something.

"Let's go to bed," Seungcheol had walked over Seokmin, pulling both his arms so that he stood up. Seokmin nodded, and then walked out of the room alone. Outside his shared room, Soonyoung was waiting for him with his back propped up against the wall.

"Seokmin."

His hand hovered by the door handle, stopping him in his place the second his name was called.

"Don't worry," Soonyoung reached out his hand and rubbed his back. "Just focus on Chae-ri. She's the one we are watching it for, not Paris. If anything happens let me know, okay?"

Seokmin smiled and nodded at his friend's concern for him. He seemed to be doing that a lot, nodding. Ever since that moment with Paris on screen, words have never been more difficult to say. Whenever he wanted to say something, it just got caught in his throat and stuck there, choking him. So he decided to say nothing instead. Soonyoung headed in first, Seokmin following closely and they turned in for the night.

Sleep didn't come easy for Seokmin, and it was only the beginning.