As Real as it Gets

Vacation and Relaxation (Chapter 6, Part 6)

"Rick, Honey, don't do this to me... please... don't leave me..." you cried laying your head on his chest, "I love you so much..." You never thought the end of such a beautiful relationship would come so soon and so painfully. Thinking it would last forever, it never crossed your mind that you could lose him.

"I love you, too." His eyes fluttered open and he placed his hand on your head, "I'd never leave you, Babe. I'm not stupid."

"OH MY GOD!" you screamed and hugged him tightly when he sat up, "What- what happened?! You weren't breathing, y- you didn't have a pulse!"

"I was just pretending to be dead, I used a- "

You interrupted him when you remembered something important, "They're coming after your family! They're going to kill them!"

Rick jumped to his feet and the two of you started running through the parks. He knew of a shortcut and took you to the back entrance of the spa building. You entered and were immediately met with Abner's men, they were turned around so they didn't see you quickly hide behind a big potted plant. They were talking to a spa employee, asking if they had seen you, Rick or his family.

"Rick, don't you have a gun?" you whispered.

"No, the spa doesn't allow guns. Besides, I didn't think I would need it."

"How are we gonna get rid of them?"

Rick looked around, trying to think of something, "I got a plan, c'mon."

You sneaked past the mafia before you made your way into the room with the giant purple, eyeless creatures. Rick stepped in front of the shelves that held bottles of weird liquids, the ones that Jerry spilled. He made sure not to fall down the hole and took some bottles.

"What are you doing? We gotta hurry before they get to the apartment!" you panicked.

"This stuff works like a charm!" he started transferring the liquid into two spray bottles, "It's great for your teeth and bad for your... everything else." He handed one bottle to you. "It's perfectly deadly!" The two of you got in the elevator and up to the apartment floor. Luckily, no mafia in the hallway. Rick knocked on the door, "Open up, it's us."

An unlocking sound was heard and Morty opened the door to let you in, "Rick? W- wh- what is happening? Why did we have to go back and lock the door?"

"Because," Rick took out some big knives from the kitchen and gave everyone to use as a weapon, "an alien mafia is on our tail trying to murder us all." Beth and Summer panicked, Rick tried to hush them, "Stop panicking, will ya? It's fine, they're dumbasses."

"Why aren't we portaling home?!" Morty questioned.

"They made me destroy my portal gun. We'll have to go to a Space Port not too far from here and board a galaxy cruise ship that will take us to our solar system within a few hours."

A knock was heard at the door, "Room service!"

Everyone froze in panic. Rick looked over at his daughter, "Did anyone order anything?" he whispered.

"Not to my knowledge." Beth said. The kids and Jerry shook their heads in denial of calling room service.

"Wrong room!" Rick yelled at the door.

"I don't so!" the door was knocked down and two mafia members barged in, "Didn't we kill you like five minutes ago?"

"You should've tried harder." Rick stopped one of them, punched him in the face and sprayed him with the spray-bottle. The alien screamed in pain as his body bubbled and melted away.

The other one came after you. As you quickly moved backwards, you accidentally collided with Summer and you both fell to the ground. The spray-bottle flew out of your hand and out of reach. The two of you screamed as the alien got closer. Morty suddenly jumped at him and stabbed him in the arm then kicked him to the ground.

Rick came over and threatened him with the spray, "Where are the others?"

"Calling for backup." The alien laughed.

"What backup?!" Rick asked, but the alien closed his eyes and exhaled for the final time before he could answer. "God fucking damnit. Alright c'mon, we gotta get the fuck out of here." Everyone started to make their way out of the apartment and into the elevator. Rick turned to his grandson, "I saw what you did back there... Good job, Morty."

"Thanks, Rick." Morty smiled.

When you got out of the elevator you walked up to the front desk. "Excuse me, have you seen some particularly ugly guys?" Rick spoke quickly, "With a bunch of scars and eye patches? And they kind of look like they're a part of a mafia?" 

The alien at the desk thought for a moment then pointed his finger to the room over, "I saw one of them talking on the phone over there."

Within a second Rick started running towards the room. He spotted the mafia guy and immediately sprayed him with the deadly liquid. The horrified spa employees ran away screaming as Rick threw the bottle over his shoulder when he noticed it was empty. The phone was lying on the ground and a call was still going, but no name or number was shown on screen.

"Who is this?!" Rick yelled at the phone after he picked it up.

"Hello, Rick." A spine-chilling voice spoke on the other line, "Are you having fun with my pets?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm having a blast." The level of sarcasm in Rick's tone was off the charts, "Now tell me: Who the fuck are you?"

"Now, why would I tell you that?"

"Maybe because I want to kill you?"

"I don't think you want to do that, Rick."

"Are you saying you're scared of me?" Rick raised an eyebrow.

"I'm saying: I'm able to ruin your life within a minute of you trying to kill me."

"How exactly?"

"You love your precious girlfriend, right?" the voice whispered slowly, "I can take her away. Your lovely Y/N, gone!"

"Don't even fucking think about it." Rick growled, "Because if you do... I'll find you and I'll make you wish your mother never gave birth to you."